people born in 24 Are 2000 now

This is the smartest dumb thing I've ever read, take my reblog and crawl back down your well

can you move your cake I'm trying to watch the game

Menthol cigarettes were invented by a man called Spud who was born in Mingo Junction

just realized im wearing a long green jacket that’s torn at the bottom and a white shirt and black pants. im becoming a person i dont recognize

boobs is better than titties as a word because boobs is bouba while titties is kiki

i refuse to read or learn anything about Worm because im having fun trying to piece together a plot based on the disconnected posts i see on my dash about it like an illiterate medieval peasant piecing together the story of creation via stained glass windows. as far as i can tell it's Homestuck for leftists with superpowers instead of trolls

Story that tries to include that common "extending your life is Unnatural and Wrong" message but instead of fighting aging the "villain" is trying to learn lucid dreaming to extend the percentage of their life they are conscious.

The writer contrives it so that lucid dreaming requires sacrificing a human mind to perform.

what they dont tell you about adulthood is that it’s startlingly easy to go long periods of time without having any fun at all not even a little bit. btw this causes ur brain to try to kill you with knives and hammers.

nosferatu? no. tuferatu. no es mi problema.

no mi circo no mis feratus

last week I was deep in the trenches ploughing through work and mid-afternoon realised I'd neglected to open the blinds and the room was a little dim, so I got up to do that and discovered that a car had flipped onto its roof directly outside my flat and the entire street was closed and flooded with emergency service while they dragged someone out of the vehicle and packed them into an ambulance. so now every time I open the blinds I'm a little like the dog with the ham sandwich bush. what the fuck could it be today.

Took Ollie to the vet today. And I'm not gonna say who. But ONE of us had a panic attack immediately after the checkup and wouldn't get out of the sink

yknow its interesting how something can impact one demographic in a completely different way than everyone else. in the exorcist when the demon starts speaking in greek, to most people its creepy. but if youre greek and you suddenly start hearing the demon speak perfect fucking greek its genuinely the biggest scare of the movie. you just do not expect to ever hear your language in american movies so it catches you so badly off guard, it feels like the movie is talking directly to you