Extremely Tall Goblin

i tend to avoid discourse because most of it is trite and pointless but just this once i feel like i need to state my opinion: i think everyone should bend to my dark and evil will

finally someone said it

me and the boys have a couple of chains wrapped around the sword in the stone hooked up to mikes toyota tundra gonna pull that fucker out like a tooth.

Me and the boys misunderstood the arcane nature of the stone and now the Toyota is king of England

magical girl transformation but i just rapidly go through the 5 stages of decomposition

NO im NOT mad that my powers haven't activated AT ALL yet *my telekinesis throws nothing across the room*

Can I see your dick and balls in these trying times

the flesh is unwilling and honestly, the spirit isn't too keen on the idea either

Normalize telling your mutual you want his fat, beautiful cock throbbing in your ass.

Booty shorts that say this

it's not that I need a quiet day or a day off exactly; it's that I need a pocket of time that exists entirely outside of linear time as we know it that would allow me to get things done without time passing in the real world, and frankly, I don't think that's too much to ask.

ur either jerking off with me or jerking off against me

never has there been a series with more underutilized background lore than the Chronicles of Narnia. book one establishes that there exists a world-between-the-worlds, an infinite glade that can be accessed only via ancient Atlantean magic, fractaling in all directions with infinite crystal-clear pools of water representing the various dimensions of the multiverse—dimensions which contain realms of gods and technology, and magic of various types, and different magical systems for each dimension, and dead worlds, and worlds that have not yet sprung to life, and a million other wonders. book two has a talking beaver

basically im always waiting for things to fall within my clutches/get caught in my grasp

im scheming of a plot to plan to orchestrate a strategy to devise a scenario in which i concoct a formulation of tactics so devilish that, when enacted, even i won’t be prepared for the fallout

my therapist says i’ve gotta be more proactive

who doesn’t love to see a little shaft