mostly void, partially stars

Dahling you simply must read this book! It’s all about this devious little caterpillar who simply gorges himself on all manner of divine things

hi love you guys do me a favor. big big big BIG breath in right now all the way all the way breathe in feel your belly expanding hold hold hold.. hold.. now everything out like ur a deflating balloon. whoosh. whooooooooosh. imagine water streaming from the top of your head down your shoulders off the ends of your fingertips and toes. u are a reed in a river a beam of pure light a steady anvil solid and heavy. ok that was all thank u

whose dumb ass idiot fuck idea was it to make medicine cost money

go to triple hell

the version of you from five years ago would be genuinely amazed by what you’ve handled since then. sit with that for a second

Soccer players are the horses of men’s sports. They run around in fields for hours on end. They stub their toe and they die. They fall and they die. They run into each other and

Never not thinking about that post about people wanting to be the fun aunt but never wanting to be around when kids are young and how much they’re missing out on. Related note. My friend’s toddler is obsessed with ravens so I’m now self-drafting a pattern for a toddler sweater covered in ravens. I’m thinking maybe a granny square situation so I can assemble it into the size she is at Christmas.

i hate viruses so fucking much. literally getting attacked by a fucking shape. a concept. consumes no energy. responds to no stimuli. its only existence is to fuck with you. like fuck offf

[ID: Tumblr tags that read: "#right?? #it's not even a beast or a creature. #a bacterium is at least a guy. a horrible little scallawag of a guy but a guy nontheless. #a virus is just. a mean tiny complicated philips head screwdriver. #fuck off out of here. go back to concept town". /end ID]

When I was training to be a paramedic, we had one student ask the instructor what to do in the event of a marijuana overdose. The instructor said "Tell him to take two twinkies and call you in the morning."

My grandma told me she was happy I got the option to be single and unmarried once.

Very suspicious of people stealing his tail

apparently youre supposed to perform. they love it when you perform. but it has to be authentic. they hate it when it's not authentic. but you have to perform.

…I can’t think how it took me so long to run across this. I feel privileged to have been found by it. 😄