Lightning Mcqueen is a Thot

…They did what… to you? No. I will make them pay. You’re fucking mine. And nobody, nobody, lays a goddamn finger on you.

Me when I get my car back from the mechanics and the adjustment on my seat is all wrong

This is the funniest fucking addition

I am putting it out there into the universe that I would like to have just one teensy little romantic interaction soon please

I feel sorry for the old man, but it was stealing.  There is no apparently about it. Water is not free, it’s not a right to have it, and people pay must pay for it.  If a government gives a thing to you like utilities, its still not free because they take it from somewhere else, like in taxes.  

Nestle isn’t gonna fuck you

Also water IS a human right, it’s classified as one by the UN the only country that really disagrees with this is the United States

The true main character of The Social Network 2010 dir David Fincher was Erica Albright for dumping Mark Zuckerberg and telling him “you're going to go through life thinking that girls don't like you because you're a nerd. and I want you to know, from the bottom of my heart, that that won't be true. it'll be because you're an asshole.” Legend. I think about her every time i argue with nerds online.

men should cry and have sex with each other

why can’t foot fetishists just google “feet pics” instead of asking people for them

Absolutely FUCKS. Next question.

This is an efficient use of the space above the stairs that would otherwise be wasted is what it is

*preparing to go outside* i'm normal. i know how to cross the street. i avoid eye contact in an organic non weird way, as if i simply do not notice fellow pedestrians.

lying to people in positions of power (landlords, rental agencies, employers) to get what u want (a flat, a job, whatever) is cool and u should do it more often.

maybe it’s the Older Sibling in me but lying to people outright, by omission, or by implication is a useful skill. if the landlord says it’s not a party flat tell them you’re relieved to hear that because you hated living with people who had people over a lot. no you didn’t meet your future roommates through a facebook flatmate searching group, you met through mutual friends. you’re neurotypical and love working with people, customer service is your passion! you used to do tons of volunteer work in high school while also juggling extracurriculars and maintaining good grades which shows you’re really good at time management and like being busy, nevermind the fact that your school required you to do those volunteer hours. lie on the spot! adapt! you too can be the perfect person for every single situation! don’t feel bad about it! there’s no reason to be honest as long as it won’t directly be clockable as a lie!

Hey short people! Looking for a way to get taller? Try replacing your feet with LIVE BEARS. You’ll be taller AND have two LIVE BEARS ATTACHED TO YOUR BODY.

imagine you are a fictional character! reblog and put in the tags what food/drink the fandom would base your entire character off of

A Google doc with resources for Afghanistan 

Form for U.S.-based attorneys willing to help Afghans with their SIV, P-2, and humanitarian parole cases (via Afghan Diaspora for Equality & Progress)