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fancywalking

every time my super orders something online the package in the lobby will say it's for the "super intended" and I just think that's cute

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bpdohwhatajoy

I hate talking about mental illness because no matter what it comes off like this

as seen in this listicle

#rocket silence

opinions-of-things

Larva Lamp :)

#oh worm

redead-red

watching a movie at home circa like, 2001 was like

put your TV on channel 2 so the VCR will work

open up the clamp shell case that held the VHS that has that satisfying crrlikkkkkk

put in the movie

gdi it has to be rewound

press STOP and then rewind because its so much faster that way

start the movie and it takes a few seconds for the movie to actually start cause you rewound to the VERY beginning

FBI will get you if you illegally distribute or exhibit this movie

and then. because you forgot that movies are always so much louder than TV

COMING SOON TO OWN ON VIDEO AND DVD

QUICK LOWER THE VOLUME LOWER THE VOLUME LOWER THE VOLUME OH FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay crisis averted.

although. these ads are kind of quiet. a little hard to hear.....

better turn up the volume...

THX

unsolids-your-snake

Posts you can hear

wickedwonderlandd

Posts you can feel in your soul 😭😭

#clamp shell #I like it

figofswords

weary and wary are not the same word and have very different meanings and if i see one more person use wearily when they mean warily I’m gonna combust

figofswords

weary: tired, worn-out, beaten down, exhausted, in need of rest. they were weary after their long journey. wearily, she sat down on the couch and kicked off her shoes. he had grown weary of this conversation.

wary: guarded, cautious, on-edge, careful. they were wary of the approaching stranger. warily, she poked at the dark shape in the corner of her room. he paused, wary, but nodded anyway.

luxwing

figofswords

thank you for this reply you get the funny crown today with bonus points for accuracy

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Found in a Buzzfeed list

they point out:

This person who was technically right — rotisserie chicken is roast history, in a way:

Making this a true eggcorn, I mean I think with the "roast" in there it can count.

#eggcorn #eggcorns #roast history chickens

bewbin

still don’t get why putting ice cream on a dessert makes it muslim?

muffinrag

#great contributions from Tony today #everyone say thank you Tony

kimpossibooty

when I was a kid, I was convinced that in Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, the last line was" You'll go down in his story" as in Santa Claus's story, and it took multiple years before I accepted that the word was "History"

This is very sweet! Thank you for sharing it with me. There is a similar mondegreen among Rush fans in "Working Man" where Geddy either takes out "a nice cold beer" or "an ice-cold" one >_<

aethersea

Grammar PSA

the expression you're looking for is reining in. it is NOT reigning in. it comes from horseback riding.

you REIN IN your horse when you pull on the rein to tell him to slow down.

similarly, you GIVE HIM FREE REIN when you loosen your grip on the reins and let him run as fast as he likes.

that's where the metaphor comes from. you can rein in your evil vizier when he proposes a little too much child murder, or you can give him free rein when you need your enemies obliterated and only underhanded treachery will do. but unless he actually pulls off that nefarious coup he's plotting, the only one reigning here is you.

#i love to rein bro #not an eggcorn

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tgirl-thucydides

#not an eggcorn

donnathepirana

Just saw a restaurant review that said "the biscuits were emasculate..."

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