āāNo, my 10 year old son is not looking for a girlfriend. He likes boys.ā In the beginning of this semester, the school of our children sent home a list of extracurricular clubs available for students. Our younger son chose a board games club, our older son chose Zumba. He loves singing and dancing, and we were all happy. As the semester passed, they both enjoyed their clubs, but the choice of the older one always received the same reaction, something like āHeās smart. I bet heās the only boy there and he can choose the girl he wants.ā The first time this happened I was shocked, because I had never thought like that. In our family, we donāt exactly follow the gender roles. My husband is the one that stays home and cooks. We have three sons and what they want to do is simply what they want to do. We accept them. It doesnāt matter if itās not āmale likeā. We asked our older boy if being the only boy there made him uncomfortable, he said āNoā and that was it. But peopleās reactions bothered me. My older son is gay. Yes, heās only 10, but he identifies himself as gay since he was 7. So this idea that he was there only for the girls bothered me. For years, weāve been dealing with a good number of shocked reactions for our sonās sexual orientation, but I never stop being bothered by people assuming that my sonās straight. At some point, I got so bothered that I started to correct people. āNoā, I say, āheās not interested in girls. Heās gay. He says that girls are his friends.ā So the reaction is āOh, really? How does he know that? Heās so youngā¦ā These people donāt see the contradiction in their words. They assumed my son was straight and wanted to be with girls, but heās too young to know he likes boys. Assumptions are dangerous. This, in particular, implies that is something wrong with my son, and there isnāt. He should be exactly who he is. I remember my first crush. He was a friend of my uncle. I think I was 6 or 7 and I used to follow him everywhere. It wasnāt sexual. I just knew I wanted to be around him. I see how my son blushes when he talks about a boy he likes. Heās discovering what he likes, like I did. Before gay kids had the opportunity to be raised in a non homophobic environment and with out people in their lives, their crushes that to be kept as a secret. But my son doesnāt have a secret. I think that itās important to speak up, correct people when they assume my son is straight. I have to say āNo, this doesnāt apply to my son.ā Because kids donāt become gay by magic when they hit puberty. Sexual orientation is something deeper. Itās something that has nothing to do with sex, but with love and attraction. And itās beautiful. Thatās nothing wrong with it.ā
ā Best mom award.Ā x (via lourrye)
This is such a wonderful post and deserves a wider audience. I knew that I was gay and that I preferred boys when I was 7 or 8. Although in those days (50 yrs ago) it was never discussed.
Well put and if people cannot accept tell them to move along and mind there business
