twitter refugee

“This is the LockPickingLawyer and today I’ve got something quite special, this locked alien chest. First of all I have to thank everyone who recommended me for the job, I’m honored that you all thought of me. Now let’s get to work”

The council representatives were confused as they started analyzing the translation, before even getting through the name he spoke something haunting

“Normally I don’t say things like this but this lock is quite unique, however with no security pins it will still be quite quick.”

“There we go, a click on 3… “

All the species of the galactic council sat dumbfounded, they spent many galactic cycles refining and perfecting their study and in all their time not a singular race had tried this method. Click after click, even in such an intricate lock the human had only spent around five minutes tampering with it.

-cat pokemon just showed up one day

-racoon/skunk/crow pokemon found in dumpster at work

-fist fighting a pokemon that is trying to steal your moms berries

-inherit pokemon from your deceased great great aunt twice removed

-thought you were feeding the cute little mice pokemon in the apartments laundry complex. it was a haunter.

-previous owners abandoned pokemon in the house you move into at the beginning of game

-accidentally eaten and now pokemon feels bad for you and follows you around

-won a shady internet giveaway you didnt sign up for

-finding a poached pokemon that escaped from the evil guys

-being rejected from training school and being comforted by a mimikyu

eight year old me:

The first panel is of an orange cat standing at the bedside of a woman with a large chest. The cat says “May the lord bless thee”.

The second panel is labelled “An hour passes thrice” and shows the woman waking up to look at her much smaller chest with a nun standing beside her bed. The nun says “Hark! Thine breast are hereupon reduced.”

In the third panel, the woman says “Wherefore is Garfield the Grimalkin absent?” With the nun responding “Whomst did thee believe claimed thine burden?”