Rat Vibes

@ot3

So. Scientifically a kitty cat can fall asleep anywhere and so much. But scientifically they are also ready to get up and go at any moment, which is impressive

If it were me, and I were dead asleep moments ago, I would not be so ready to tag along on a 1am bathroom adventure at a moment’s notice. But a kitty cat

my partner and i have become fixated on this stupid comment left by a conspiracy theorist on instagram and we can't stop saying it and i just know i'm gonna slip up and say it to a normal person

Boss tries to fire me for poor performance but I punch the ground and spit out blood and say "No... this isn't how this ends" while my leitmotif plays

blocked someone for having "strong opinions" on how much they hate tofu . she isnt a joke to me thats my fucking wife youre talking about

look i know theyre going to martyr him no matter what and this will probably lead to an uptick in hate speech and retaliatiatory violence yadda yadda it’s not all sunshine and rainbows but ohhh my god how nice it is to think some of these people might realize they’re not actually untouchable and above consequence

love lies bleeding is everything that cishets acted like saltburn was and more

absolutely in love with the idea of wendy's introducing dynamic pricing. i think they should introduce time share lunch next, where for a reduced price you can eat a burger that has been partially consumed by someone else. i also think that the soft drink dispenser should have gacha game mechanics instead of letting you autonomously select your beverage and should make moaning noises when releasing it into your cup.

one time i was having sex and i was going “i’m yours i’m yours i’m yours” and then my partner stopped all of a sudden and said “can we talk about new kinks before we introduce them during sex” and i was like yeah what but it turned out she thought i was saying im a horse im a horse im a horse

i must not miss class. missing class is the mind-killer. missing class is the little-death that brings total obliteration. i will face my lecture. i will permit it to pass over me and through me. and when it has gone past i will turn the inner eye to see its path. where the class has gone there will be nothing. only i will remain.