Mr. Vanilla Milkshake

They offered me a job as a fucker. Yeah you heard me right, a fucker. Job is to fuck things. Boss points at something and says fuck it, I fuck it. That's my job. And I'm damn good at it. Pays like dirt and wears on the mind. Wears on the mind.

money beyond ypur wildist dreams

one hundred and seventy dollars

i was having a really hard morning but my daughter of 3 years said mommy dont cry i made you a drum n bass playlist

High key the nut vids use to be crazier. Wjht happened?

Nobodys busting hard no more

I know we’re all like lawless nonconformists but you really can’t be texting and driving. that’s one of the ones you’ve gotta listen to for real

whatever needs to be said was said in iris by the goo goo dolls

nvm i’ve said too much #unknowme

going over to my minimalist girlfriend’s house and she apologizes profusely for the mess and there’s just a single perfect, fresh pea on the floor of her living room

Blue Lois

can i help you

Red Marge

jesus christ. I Am Under Fucking Attack

happy pride to losers who get no bitches and stack no paper

given the current climate this pride especially i feel i must mention that i love my trans friends, i stand with trans people in the fight against transphobic legislation and those who would enforce it, and this blog is not a good place for you to be if you do not vibe with that

just molted for the first time ama

U feelin' mushy? Easily susceptible to predation..?

ok no more questions

I CLAIM THE ABUNDANCE THAT IS COMING TO ME NOW 🌈🙏💖✨ *falls asleep and dreams of a skeletal figure atop a black horse carrying iron scales*

I really love when cats use their front legs to hold something in place while they use their back legs to kick the absolute shit out of it

movie

"it is what it is," he coped seethingly