Not actually misinformed

I'm currently living in a two-cat household, and there's a thing that happens where the first cat is calling for me, the second cat shows up like "you rang?", and the first cat immediately smacks the second cat in the face like "not you, knucklehead". They do this every day.

The second cat always comes running when the first cat calls for me, even though it gets her dope-slapped with 100% reliability. I suspect she simply enjoys the attention.

job interviewer: would you be willing to destroy and betray yourself for nothing?

job interviewer: (reading the room) would you be willing to destroy and betray yourself for a pizza party?

I want all animals to become sapient enough to produce art specifically because I want to see what sort of sex homunculus caricature each species would create if given the ability to draw

Like we've already got the anime waifu with the needle-waist and watermelon-bazonkas and borzoi-legs and bug-eyes. Now show me a fucked-up stupid beetle as drawn by a horny beetle. I want to see what a cartoonishly sexy lion looks like according to lions. I want to see the most ridiculous drawing of a peahen that would have the peacocks squaring up by the fountain.

We give this power to ostriches and they just start drawing people

you used to be able to get a job just by circling a listing in a newspaper in red pen

You walked up to that house in the rain on purpose

the fuck else would I be sloshing around in a wet ballgown for

im going to be honest i dont want to see that shit

hey looks it's my shipping goggles!

Keep me company but stay out of my way. The dream.

I go outside regularly

no you don't

okay fine I go outside weirdly