In Defense of Loving Demona Honestly: Why Criticism Is Not Hate
One of the strangest accusations Iāve had to endure over the years is the charge that I donāt really love Demona. That Iām somehow a āfake fan.ā This accusation has been hurled at me despite the fact that Iāve spent decades discussing her, writing about her, debating her, and analyzing her. Despite the fact that sheās my favorite fictional character of all time. Despite the fact that I have her tattooed on my skin.
And yet, in certain corners of the fandom, the belief persists: that because I donāt excuse her actions, or because I wonāt indulge in certain fan wish-fulfillment fantasies about her redemption, I must secretly hate her. Thatās not only wrong, it betrays a very shallow understanding of what it means to actually love a character.
For many fans, āloving a characterā has been reduced to one thing: always defending them. If you excuse every action, justify every crime, or paint over every flaw, youāre a āreal fan.ā If you donāt ā if you dare to say the character was wrong, monstrous, or even irredeemable ā then you must dislike them.
Itās a binary mode of thinking: either youāre in their corner 100%, or youāre against them. Nuance, complexity, and honest critique donāt fit in this model. Which means that for characters like Demona ā characters written with deliberate tragedy, ambiguity, and horror ā this fandom logic simply collapses.
I refuse to defend the indefensible. I can empathize with Demona, understand her, and mourn her tragedy ā but I wonāt excuse her genocide attempts, her betrayals, or her willingness to kill even other gargoyles who oppose her. And because I draw that line, some people leap to the conclusion that I donāt love her.
Hereās the thing: loving a character does not mean shielding them from criticism. It means engaging with them deeply enough to take them seriously. It means resisting the temptation to flatten them into a mascot for your own comfort. It means allowing them to be complex, contradictory, even terrifying.
Thatās why Demona is my favorite character of all time. Because she resists simplification. She is tragic, but she is also guilty. She is sympathetic, but she is also monstrous. She is brilliant and beautiful, but also consumed by hatred. She is, in short, human ā in the most flawed and dangerous ways imaginable, despite not being human at all.
To love her is to love her complexity, not to whitewash it.
So why do people insist otherwise? Why do they claim I āhateā Demona?
1. Because I Wonāt Coddle Her
Some fans want Demona to be coddled. They want her actions to be excused as āunderstandable.ā They want her massacres written off as righteous vengeance. When I refuse to play along with that ā when I call murder what it is ā they hear it as hostility. But it isnāt hostility. Itās honesty.
2. Because I Separate Empathy from Justification
Iāve always said that Demona is understandable. Her trauma is real. Her pain is genuine. But empathy doesnāt erase responsibility. And for many fans, those two things are indistinguishable. If you empathize, you must justify. If you refuse to justify, you must lack empathy. Itās a false dichotomy, but itās common.
3. Because They Want Redemption, and I Donāt
Another huge sticking point is redemption. Fandom is hooked on the idea that Angelaās love could redeem Demona. That all she needs is a hug and some acceptance and sheāll change her ways. Iāve argued for decades that this is naive at best, dishonest at worst. Demonaās problem isnāt a lack of exposure to humans; itās her refusal to take responsibility for her own role in her clanās destruction. Angelaās love doesnāt fix that. And when I say so, the pushback is always: āYou must hate her if you donāt want her to be redeemed.ā No ā I want her to remain true to what makes her compelling.
4. Because Attraction Clouds Judgment
Letās be blunt: Demona is sexy. Her design is gorgeous, her performance magnetic. For many fans, that attraction turns into moral blindness. āSheās hotā becomes shorthand for āsheās right.ā When I cut through that and say, āYes, sheās attractive, but sheās also a genocidal maniac,ā some fans react like Iāve insulted them personally. Again, critique gets confused with contempt.
5. Because I Make the Character Uncomfortable Again
Demona is a warning. She shows how guilt becomes externalized, how trauma turns into ideology, how righteous anger metastasizes into mass hatred. Sheās not safe. Sheās not cozy. Sheās not there to comfort us. When I insist on this, I strip away the fanon soft-focus versions of Demona that people have built to soothe themselves. And when you take someoneās comfort away, they often lash out. The easiest way to dismiss me is to claim: āWell, you just donāt love her like we do.ā
What makes the accusation especially absurd is that I have given more of my time, thought, and passion to Demona than any other fictional character. Iāve debated her endlessly. Iāve defended the writing of her character when people complained she was ātoo evil.ā Iāve tattooed her on my body ā something you donāt do lightly.
If anything, my love for her is deeper than that of the so-called apologists. Because I donāt need her to be safe, or fixable, or right. I love her in all her terrifying, tragic complexity. I donāt confuse comfort with love.
At the end of the day, the accusation that I āhateā Demona says more about fandom than it does about me. Fandom too often reduces characters to mascots, to be defended unconditionally, redeemed at all costs, or excused because theyāre attractive. It treats criticism as betrayal. It treats nuance as hostility.
But if we do that, we donāt really love the character. We love our idea of the character. We love what they do for us. Demona deserves better than that. She deserves to be engaged on her own terms ā as a fully realized creation whose tragedy is that she is both sympathetic and horrifying.
So let me say it clearly: I love Demona. I always have, I always will. She is the greatest fictional character ever created. And precisely because of that, I will not lie about her. I will not excuse her crimes, erase her guilt, or force her into a redemption arc that cheapens her.
If that makes me a āfake fanā in some peopleās eyes, so be it. Iād rather love her honestly than worship her dishonestly. Because real love ā whether for a person or for a character ā doesnāt require coddling. It requires truth.
And the truth about Demona is that she is magnificent, monstrous, tragic, terrifying, and unforgettable.
Thatās why I have her on my skin. Thatās why Iāll keep writing about her. And thatās why Iāll never apologize for loving her in the only way that matters: by refusing to reduce her to something she isnāt.