kevin day fanatic 4EVA!!1

This is a really good example of how TERFs disguise their attacks against trans men, and why it’s so harmful to consider TERF attitudes towards trans mascs as infantilizing.

The post is made to appear sympathetic to the man they are mocking. “Look at this poor ‘girl’ and how he’s mutilated himself” sounds sympathetic, especially to trans people who are subjected to aggressive, direct attacks on their identities and humanity.

But this performative sympathy is just a front so that TERFs can enjoy being cruel without appearing as the aggressor. This allows the audience to still enjoy the pleasure of engaging in cruelty while dressing it up as pity.

This plays into the broader tactic TERFs deploy with trans mascs.

Rarely ever do they confront us directly the way they do with trans women.

In fact, because they see us as women, their primary objective is to make sure we are never ever heard at all, so that they can maintain the narrative that none of us would ever transition of our own free will.

Instead, they poison the well. They talk to our “handlers”. Our parents, our doctors and psychiatrists, our husbands, boyfriends, our pastors.

The veneer of sympathy is not to appeal to trans men. It is to appeal to those they see as having ownership over us. When trans men fight back against this, the malice comes out in full force.

Uh huh. Really feminist there. But because the target is a trans man, all the misogyny in the world is justified.

Case in point, I've never been to a woman's only space that wasn't obviously hostile to me, and that's when I was even allowed there in the first place. And I understand why - my voice is very low and I make no attempt at voice training, I dress in a gender neutral way, hormones have done very little for me. Unless I am making a special effort to be feminine I clock as a guy. I am also tall and broad. The only way I can gain any kind of acceptance in "woman's spaces" is if I go to extreme effort to completely warp my presentation and step on egg shells the entire time. If im not actively ashamed and apologetic about the fact I read as a man I am not welcome.

Because, again, the reality of woman's spaces is that they are about the comfort of those who organize them.

I'm also very aware that it's not just non passing trans women who get the short end of the stick here. There is a long history of racism connected to these kinds of spaces that absolutely has not been resolved, for example.

The other half of the woman's spaces discourse is about resources, and is just so detached from reality it is kind of pathetic. The idea that a trans man coming into a woman's only space is somehow stealing resources from women is pervasive as it is stupid. The reality is that very few resources of any kind are expended in cases like this, and far more important is the single most important resource in marginalized politics, solidarity and coalition strength. Any "loss" of resources that occurs when lines are blurred is more than made up for by the social and political power that depends on different marginalized people regularly interacting with each other.

my mom is in fact aware that dandelions exist. she temporarily forgot the name and there was some miscommunication.

the truth is actually weirder

she’s aware dandelions look like this

she is familiar with this flower. she knows the name of this flower. she declines to believe, however, that these are also dandelions

she does not believe these are the same plant. I tried to explain, and she thought I was either misinformed or lying. so I asked her what exactly did she think the yellow ones were called?

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Transandrophobia is not meant to imply that trans men face discrimination solely on the basis of being a man. The thing about it is that the trans modifier has a unique effect on the concept of being a man.

Transandrophobia as it is typically explained actually primarily results from misogyny.

When looking at it from the perspective of a trans person you think that it would be incorrect to assume trans men primarily face a specific form of misogyny, but to truly understand oppression you need to understand the perspective of the oppressor.

Transphobes and a lot of allegedly supportive cis people do not see trans men as men. And because the majority of them were raised as girls, they are at best seen as "women who think they're men".

This is where the unique intersection of transmasculinity happens. Trans men are discriminated against for being trans men because their identity as a man implies they are female.

This is why they have such high sexual assault rates, are not taken seriously by medical professionals, and are often infantalised, feminised, and erased.

All this to say, trans men and trans women experience oppression in both similar and different ways, and it's at best useless to argue over who has it "worst". The only way to actually fix most of our problems is to work together to fight a system that wants all of us dead.

Reading comprehension:

1. Did I say anything about what I PERSONALLY think about trans men or trans women and their identities?

2. Did I say cis men are oppressed? If your answer is yes, where?

3. Did I say trans women are not oppressed? If your answer is yes, where?

4. Did I say one group has it worse than the other? If yes, which group? Where?

5. If you are going to comment or reblog with commentary, formulate a response without attacking other trans people, insulting me personally, or otherwise invalidating other people's lived experiences.

A joke made in anger that is entirely unactionable does not warrant tattling to the organizations that are currently trying to strip all of us of our rights, and are looking for any reason to villainize our transfem comrades.

What’s been done cannot be undone, but please for all of our sakes remember that we’re all under the same boot, and licking said boot won’t make it any less likely to crush you too.

It’s our responsibility to take care of each other, learn from each other, and to look long and hard in the mirror when someone says your words and actions are harmful.

Solidarity. Solidarity. Solidarity.

(Most of this is answered here: https://www.tumblr.com/abearinthewoods/770794163004407808/okay-i-dont-know-a-lot-about-the-situation-but-i?source=share)

I need everybody to understand one uncomfortable but super important truth.

Class solidarity means an end to the oppression olympics.

You should never be looking in your neighbor's bowl to see if they have more than you, only to see if they have enough.

Like lets take a step back for a quick moment and recap whats going on here. She made jokes about killing one of the most unsupported and invisible members of the LGBTQ community, because why?

Like no, lets actually address that.

Trans men want to use terms like trans misandry and trans androphobia to talk about their oppression, not terms like trans misogyny and trans emasculation. and for this they got bomb and death threats from other people in the trans community?!?!?!?!?!?

Because trans men want to use words centered around their their hatchling gender, not their egg gender, to describe their oppression, because they don't want to center their discussions about their issues around some axis of women as the most oppressed, they got hit with a massively outsized amount of hate from (a tiny collection of, lets be very fucking clear here.) mostly trans fems who drunk a little too much of radfem's cis-male hate that they decided to transpose onto trans men. All escalating to bomb threats which my inbox is now also full of.

This is your brain on oppression olympics.

This is the threat to class solidarity.

This is the threat to class solidarity.

This is exactly what they want. For us to be fighting over who has it worse. I don't give a fuck who has it better or who has it worse, and i sure as fuck don't care about any narratives that center this question around one's identity or demographics as some kind of universal truths that overrides individually.

Even when I do bring up ways in which cis or trans men have it worse, or ways in which women commit crimes more than men, I try to focus it on purely countering the opposite narrative, to make sure I am only pushing the pendulum back towards the center, nothing more.

No experience is universal and arguments about stats and oppression and privilege tend to paper over peoples individuality.

Solitary means respecting how we are different. How that changes how we all experience the world. You can't tell a trans man you have it worse than him without disrespecting this because you can not know his life, what he went thru, how his brain's chemistry makes minor changes to how he sees or deals with adversity that build up over time, or how the same difficulties may be harder or easier for somebody to handle or overcome based how they were raised or what other experiences they went thru.

There is a reason why countries who are not at war with each other fly their flags all at the same height; never flying their flag above their ally's flag. They stand as one. United. Because that is what solitary actually means.

We stand at a fork. Down one path is trans men using words like trans misandry to talk about their oppression and trans rad fems on tumblr not interjecting with some bullshit, and down the other path is trans men still using words like trans misandry, but also the hostility comes out and you'll get shit like them telling the same trans radfems to stop calling their oppression trans misogyny, and start calling it trans misandry, and the whole world goes blind. Because i've seen how understandably upset trans women have gotten at me when they've mistakenly thought i was actually suggesting that, its not a blow in the gender war we'll come back from if it enters the discourse.

(as an aside thought experiment, its actually kinda hard to truly only be sexist in one direction. like one could argue that slutshaming is implying there is something dirty or unclean about men/manliness that they 'taint' women with by having sex with them. but you'd rightly call me dick if MRAs started showing up to the local feminism meet and interjecting that every time the topic comes up. And as an MRA, So would I. So please lets stop trying to argue over the "true" direction of acts of sexism and let people be individuals who experience and talk about it in their own way.)

We are each other’s biggest allies, and in a time where we are all being targeted more than ever by governments we can’t let internet assholes and Internet arguments ruin community and our mental health.

If someone is making negative sweeping statements about any group of trans people— I’ve seen people claim that trans mascs tend to be abusive!! My people that is a conservative, fascist talking point!! And I’ve seen the same said about trans femmes, which is also a conservative fascist talking point!!— please fucking Block them. Anyone using bioessentialism, claiming that trans women are “male socialized”, that trans men and trans mascs embody toxic masculinity and patriarchy upon realizing they are trans masc, is not working in anyone’s favor, these are toxic and destructive ways of thinking.

Oppression is not a zero sum game. Lack of housing is not something that is a magical “gotcha” in an Internet argument, it’s ghastly to use human suffering as social currency on fucking tumblr for who gets to speak and whose issues matter. We are all trans, we need to speak up for one another.

The worst part is talking to people who have been impacted by this irl and who are now cautious and suspect of trans mascs or trans femmes. This was not a thing when I was young! Feeling supported by trans people of all kinds helped me come out. This toxic atmosphere keeps people closeted and scared of rejection from their own community, which is the goal of the feds. Do not listen to people whose goal is to further divide trans people.

i witnessed exactly how the queer infighting of the decade became "transmascs" vs "transfems" ("tme" vs "tma") but it still hurts to see

trans rights are being taken away globally, not just FOR transfems sure but theyre still being taken RIGHT from your hands, trans siblings are being killed for being trans weekly at this point, maybe daily. and instead of doing anything about it, calling representatives or protesting, or making it harder for the people in power to get away with all this, the internets obsessed with deciding if trans men and transmascs face oppression or not to the point theyll defend SELF ADMITTED CHILD ABUSERS just to prove "those birthday boys and theyfabs" wrong

last decade's "ace people are INFILTRATING OUR community" are this decade's "(trans but I wont say this so I sound more correct) men wanna be oppressed so bad"

people have killed themselves over this and yet in a few years everyone whos participated in these suicide campaigns will suddenly decide theyre okay with transmascs actually and sweep all the violence they inadvertently commited against them or at least let happen under a rug with 0 apologies or attempts to make up for it.

You have to love her when she can't pay rent.

You have to love her when she can't do the dishes in the sink.

You have to love her when her disability isn't pretty.

You have to love her when she can't get out of bed.

pt.153!!

trojanspost for the heatwave 🔥 i cannot comprehend the california climate being considered habitable 🔥

sorry for disappearing!! i finally moved out away from uni so can now doxx my former address and say i was aftgposting from neil road for a year 💪 🙏 then became useless due to It Fucking Warm. but i am back !!

<pt.152