having anti role models is a beautiful thing. it's not easy to live up to someone else's behavior but it is easy to lasso yourself into behaving right when you realize you're reminding yourself of the worst person youve ever met in your entire life

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@crazynerdandproud
having anti role models is a beautiful thing. it's not easy to live up to someone else's behavior but it is easy to lasso yourself into behaving right when you realize you're reminding yourself of the worst person youve ever met in your entire life

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we're moving to an internet where children would be banned from reaching out for help and friendship online but abusive parents can post their children's every second online to humiliate and expose them for money with no pushback
Keep salting the wound I'm close
One million pounds to the writer of this caption in the Guardian please
Alright I want to know something here:
the 🙃 emoji means (approximately)
silly!*
ugh!*
secret third thing you will explain in tags*
*if comfortable doing so, you may include your age range/generation in the tags for helpful demographic data
kindly reblog for bigger sample size, thanks!

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One of these has the moral standing of a cartoon villain, the other might save the country.
Welcome to British politics.
I love the whole scenario of people who don't know the civilian indentity of the Bats and Robins and complain about them to their face. And while yes, in some runs Commissioner Gordon knows Dick is Robin and Barbara is Batgirl, I just find the scenario of Gordon ranting to Robin that Dick Grayson is dating Barbara hilarious for three reasons, Gordon is ranting to this teenager about his teenage daughter and her boyfriend, two: Dick is taking notes for their next encounter and three: he can make Gordon cut him some slack.
Gordon: That little punk took her to the movies last night.
Dick: Did he have her home on time? Because I know that's a deal breaker for you.
Gordon: He did.
Dick: Your daughter was happy when she got home?
Gordon, grumbling: Yes. But she came home wearing his stupid letterman jacket. I was a kid once I know what that means.
Dick: Maybe she was cold.
Gordon: Robin, see you're a good kid. You'd think that. But rich little punks like Dick Grayson? Raised by Bruce Wayne, no less?
Dick: I see why you might think that, but doesn't he keep curfew? And he drives safe? He follows your rules, Commish.
Gordon: You have a point. Not one damn speeding ticket.
Dick: Then maybe he's OK? I mean you said he's always polite when he comes over. Mrs Gordon likes him.
Gordon: I guess. But there's also that, the kid just thinks he can come to my door without asking me to take Babs out. He just shows up without even clearing it with me.
Dick: And that's... bad.
Gordon, nodding: See, you get it.
I just think it would be funny if both Ben and Yoda came back in time to Obi-Wan’s pre-apprentice years and Yoda is all ‘fuck Qui-Gon I’ve got a Sith to murder’ and takes the kid for his own Padawan so they can plan and argue all day long and now Obi-Wan is sitting in on classified meetings and Mace is all ‘??????’ Cause he can’t convince Yoda to stop bringing him OR Obi-Wan to leave and the entire order is being relegated to the LOUDEST buzzing from their constant telepathic arguments and how to go about things but instead of it relieving them that Obi-Wan is giving back as much as he’s given, everyone is panicking every time Obi-Wan disappears from temple only to show up with new kids or slaves or Mandalorians and Yoda is all ‘ugh, we get it, you have a Mandalorian fetish, stop being weird’ and even ended up getting adopted by Mand’alor Mereel along with Obi-Wan when Obi-Wan told Mereel it would be funny and he’s basically a super old toddler and throws tantrums a lot and Jaster is all ‘free ade???? For me????????’ And Yoda is trying to kill a Sith (Palpatine has gone into hiding cause the force is telling him to run for his fucking life rn) and Obi-Wan is all ‘what if I saved Mandalore and also killed all the Hutts who deal in slavery and instated a no-slavery policy everywhere and also slowly tortured slavers to death???? I just think that would be cute’ and keeps bringing him people (like a 6 month pregnant Shmi lmao) to the temple and telling Yoda he’s got a new kid, deal with it.
Mace: *holding Obi-Wan by the back of his robes like a feral tooka* Master Yoda, control your Padawan before he gets himself killed with all your shenanigans!
Yoda: Think IM the bad influence, you do? Should have seen the last master who had him!
Obi-Wan: It’s true, Master Yoda makes me go to therapy twice a month at minimum and made me get trackers in my boots. I think he’s doing good. None of the pirates have found the trackers yet.
Mace: When did you end up with pirates??????
Obi-Wan: *vividly remembering Mama Ohnaka picking up Jango and him from a slavers vessel when Montrose tried to get over Jaster’s head and just get rid of the kid when he couldn’t kill Jaster* …okay so there’s this pirate named Hondo and a few years ago he picked me up and a few others and he’s like twice my age right now but he’s really nice and keeps insinuating I’m his son and that’s SUPER weird but I’m down because whenever I’m around he’s less wild and he helped me and my friend get rid of Death Watch when I got out of the temple when I was 13 and was brought back in a stolen ship? Yeah that was him he gave me the ship, and he’s actually rather nice-
Mace: That’s it. Grandmaster Yoda, I am stealing your Padawan, you are obviously not paying enough attention to him.
Yoda: sure. Go give him advanced saber lessons, he could use a refresher, have him back by bedtime.
Obi-Wan: Yay! Special training!
And then Mace learns that Obi-Wan is one of the best warriors in the temple and Mace can’t handle his snark so he sets him loose on the galaxy again. This time Obi-Wan comes back with Shmi and proudly declares he’s gonna be the master to her baby. Yoda looks at the woman and straight up hisses at her belly like an offended cat. It’s beautiful.
no, i don’t watch that show, but i do follow its developments extensively via tumblr

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greatest dynamic in the world IS strange, eccentric asshole and their normal and polite friend who on closer inspection is actually worse in deeply weird and unexpected ways
It fits so many of my favourite OTPs. So many.
gameshow voice: is it gay subtext or are the writers just so catastrophically bad at writing female characters that the only relationships in the entire story that feel human are the ones between the men.
I spend more time than I’d like to admit thinking about this.
"Batman gave birth to me" is just the longest running lie Dickbin conjured when trying to explain how Batman acquired a child while not revealing their identities. Other lies he told the Justice League include:
He won me in a game of 'go fish'
They were draining a vat of chemicals the Joker had and I was just lying in the bottom
A gargoyle delivered me to him as a baby and I have been raised in his cave by his humanoid batservants ever since
He's actually my son from the future but when a time traveller came back and murdered the man who trained me he had to come back and take his place so I could learn how to become so awesome that his warrior goddess mother falls for me and we can make him
Someone lopped off his arm. He grew it back and I grew out of the limb
I am mark 2 of the super soldier programme that made him
Gotham has this whole cult that worships him and I was given to him as a sarcifice and everyone thought he would eat me but he didn’t so the cult was bummed out and disbanded
He hit his head really hard one day so I got him back to the cave and convinced him I had been there all along
I am a lord of chaos sent to wreak destruction upon this dimensional plane but he said I could dress up in bright colours and beat up people and that sounded awesome so... don't let me get bored I guess. My chthonic master still calls me up every so often to ask how the how destory the world thing is going
Terrible Fic Ideas #3: Re-Entry, but make it Obi-Wan and Yoda
If you've not noticed by now, I'm the biggest sucker for Time Travel Fix-Its that ever existed, and one of my absolute favorites is the Re-Entry series by the ever-wonderful flamethrower. In that series, post-RotJ Obi-Wan and Anakin are sent back to 4 years before TPM to save the Republic, and it's an absolutely wonderful ride. But one thing I've always wanted is Yoda to be thrown back in time in one of these fix-its.
Tiny Obi-Wan and Yoda just sat down somewhere having extremely Old Man conversations.
Mace: ....
Obi-Wan: you cannot imagine the things I can eat. No problem. No stomach upset. The fact Dex hasn't opened his diner yet is a travisty.
Yoda: Decades in exile subsisting on frogs I have been.
Obi-Wan: Yes, but those are good for you.
Yoda: Desire cake I do. One hundred years too late for it we are. Rubbing it in you are.
Obi-Wan: Well there must be some silver linings. The knees are nice too, but I can't reach anything.
Yoda: hmph, perspective you have gained perhaps?
Obi-Wan: not at this height.
Yoda: (laughs and gives him gentle whack with his cane) lost your cheek you have not, Master Kenobi
⭐
I absolutely adore this. It's so cute! Thanks for the fill @threebea!
(Obi-Wan eventually learns to send paperwork to Mace on time delay, so his Space Email is flooded with messages at exactly 7:01 am every day.)
Star Wars is an interesting (not saying successful, mind you, just interesting) story to examine with consideration of disability portrayal. I could talk at length about Vader, Luke, or even Grievous, but of course, you know me.
I’m here to yap about Sifo-Dyas.
Cut for meta essay discussion of disability and mental illness and representation

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I feel like the dynamic between Jedi Council members was criminally underutilized. While this isn’t canon, here are my headcanons on how things really went down.
Mace Windu:
I’ve done the math (badly), and I’m pretty sure Mace was around the same age as Xanatos. Which means Mace is like Obi-Wan’s unofficial older padawan brother. Obi-Wan didn’t ask for this, but let’s be real—he probably needed it. Not that Obi-Wan would recognize this dynamic. He’s part of the disaster lineage, so he wouldn’t know what a typical older brother acts like.
Mace seamlessly switches between “Head of the Council” mode and “exasperated big brother” mode. Except, of course, when he’s making Obi-Wan do all the paperwork.
Mace: "You're good at taxes, Kenobi. I’m just letting you shine." Obi-Wan: "I'm too honored to be insulted."
Yarael Poof:
This guy? Bigger gremlin energy than Yoda. And petty. Poof has perpetual beef with Ki-Adi-Mundi and finds great joy in trolling him. He’s the kind of guy who would take micro-naps during meetings just because “It’s only Mundi talking, everyone relax.”
Poof: "What was that, Mundi? Couldn't hear you over my sheer disinterest." Mundi: "I will demote you to Youngling wrangler, Poof."
Ki-Adi-Mundi:
The most logical thinker on the Council. He’s here to do his job, clock in, clock out, and keep the galaxy running. Unfortunately, the galaxy includes Qui-Gon and Poof, so it’s not happening. He despises surprises and strongly prefers order.
Poof: snoring in the corner
Mundi: "I swear to the Force, Poof..."
Even Piell:
Blunt. Gruff. Won’t lead a discussion but will absolutely cut into one. He’s the Jedi equivalent of “the friend who knows where to hide the body.”
Piell: "You’re the diplomat, Kenobi. I’m here to look mean so bad guys think twice." Obi-Wan: "What if we both look peaceful?" Piell: "We’ll die."
Gretz Doom:
The guy who grew up with Qui-Gon and spent his childhood teasing his clanmates, Gretz is now the Council’s strictest rule-follower. Why? Because he knows that if you mess with the Senate, the Senate will mess with the Jedi’s budget and oversight.
Doom: "Qui-Gon, did you directly disobey the Council again?"
Qui-Gon: "In fairness, the Council is often wrong."
Doom: "You’re lucky they don’t garnish your missions like they do our budget."
Tera Sinube (Retired):
The ultimate grandpa Jedi. Gives unsolicited advice, tells the same stories repeatedly, and refuses to admit that lightsaber duels aren’t "like they used to be."
Sinube: "Back in my day, we didn’t have fancy starships." Youngling: "How did you travel?" Sinube: "We walked. Uphill. Both ways. Through asteroid fields."
Youngling: "In space?"
Obi-Wan Kenobi:
Obi-Wan wanted to join the Council, found out it was a trap, and tried to quit—repeatedly. Every time he tries to mess up to get kicked out, he accidentally makes the galaxy better. Mace keeps him around because Obi-Wan’s life is the Jedi’s best unintentional reality show.
Mace: "Kenobi, you caused an intergalactic scandal again?" Obi-Wan: "Yes, but the scandal resulted in peace treaties for three systems, so..." Mace: "We are still not accepting you resignation letter"
Obi-Wan: “drats!”
Yaddle:
The only one brave enough to call Yoda out. Wise, patient, and kind, but she will not suffer riddles.
Yoda: "Difficult, the path is." Yaddle: "The budget’s tight. Just say that, Yoda."
Oppo Rancisis:
A reserved and analytical mind, Oppo specializes in strategy and seeing the bigger picture. His predictions about a rising Sith threat made him a quiet voice of reason long before others believed it.
Rancisis: "The Sith never vanished. They’re biding their time."
Mundi: "How do you know?"
Rancisis: "I just do.”
Eeth Koth:
An Anakin mirror. Eeth grew up as an angry orphan rescued by the Jedi, but he’s worked hard to control himself. Still, he’s known to clash with Mace and Grezzt Doom—occasionally on purpose. A former hothead turned disciplined Council member, Koth has a soft spot for Jedi who struggle with emotions, having once been in their shoes.
Koth: "Control your emotions, or they’ll control you."
Padawan: "Easier said than done."
Koth: "Trust me, I know. Now pick up your saber, we’re starting over."
Stass Allie:
A brilliant healer and fierce opponent of Senate corruption, Stass doesn’t tolerate nonsense. Most of her "menace energy" is reserved for politicians.
Senator: "The Republic is doing everything it can—"
Stass: "Then do better."
Senator: "I beg your pardon?"
Stass: "You heard me. Now get out of my medbay."
Adi Gallia:
The chillest Jedi off the clock, but the most cynical one during missions. She prefers intelligence to lightsabers (looking at you, Eeth Koth). Has a soft spot for Obi-Wan due to her long friendship with Qui-Gon. A calm and collected intelligence expert, Adi is the Council’s quiet strategist. She despises the war and blames the Senate for exploiting young Jedi.
Gallia: "The Senate sent Padawans to war."
Mace: "We needed soldiers."
Gallia: "We needed peace. What we got was child soldiers."
Yoda:
Wild card. Once a week, he’s doing something so bizarre that the other Council members have to pretend it’s normal.
Mace: "Why is Yoda levitating in the fountain?"
Poof: "Meditation, probably."
Feel free to add your takes!
“We all found what we missed here. But what does Obi miss?”
They all frowned a bit at that trying to think about what Obi-Wan might be missing the most.
“Mandolorians!” Quinlan exclaimed when he failed to get a prompt response.
“Huh?” Siri asked. “What do they have to do with anything?”
“Obi loves Mandolorians,” Quinlan said, practically bursting with excitement now.
“That’s true,” Bant added.
“But where do we find Mandolorians?” Garen asked with a frown.
“Mandalore, duh!” Quinlan replied.
They each nodded.
“That seems reasonable,” Bant said.
-
Obi-Wan let out a pained sound and took a deep breath.
And then proceeded to let out a string of curses in Mando’a that would make Myles blush.
Jaster was impressed.
After Obi-Wan was done insulting everything from Quinlan’s intelligence to the entire Galactic Republic Jaster cleared his throat, trying to gain their attention once more.
“I am the Mand’alor,” Jaster affirmed, “and I think you commed for a reason, yes?”
“Obi-Wan is sad and misses his Mandolorians,” one of the previously unseen ad answered, appearing suddenly on the holo.
-
Mace, being the closest to Plo, leaned over only to catch a glimpse of his own signature.
“I did not sign that,” he pointed out.
“Oh, I’m aware,” said Plo. “Neither did Masters Yaddle or Dooku.”
Dooku let out a scandalized gasp at that.
Yes, obviously Dooku had not signed it either. Or Yaddle. Or Mace. It bore repeating.
“Are you saying that a padawan filled out these documents?” Master Rancisis asked.
Mace thought he sounded almost impressed.
“Forged them, more likely,” came Dooku’s grumbled response.
“Oh, Quinlan is not a padawan,” Plo said cheerfully, “he’s six.”
- We're Jedi. We've totally got this. by mytimeconsumingsidehobby
https://archiveofourown.org/works/43724548/chapters/109950397