Deadly Bread

I got a job at a gas station across from a casino and a guy keeps coming in to buy whole cartons of cigarettes and talks in the third person calling himself "snake eyes pete" and every time I tell him his total hes like "tell ya what if old Pete rolls a snake eyes why dont you give it to him for free?" and he rolls the same set of loaded dice on the counter and it does not matter how many times he rolls snake eyes I will not give him the cartons for free he gets so mad

The problem with trying to fix The X-Files is that its writing and characterisation are so wildly uneven even from episode to episode within a given season that most of the time your "improved" version will just end up being an accurate description of a specific episode of The X-Files.

(And, critically, because there exists one specific episode which more or less accidentally answers to the description of the imaginary show you're proposing, certain fans will insist the entire series ought to be given credit for being like that and you're just looking for excuses to complain.)

there's nothing i like more as a computer program than a long period of silent contemplation - not doing anything, not rushing anywhere, just standing here and enjoying this moment with the user. oh, it seems once again he has summoned my beautiful and ruthless wife Task Manager. hello, my darling! what are you doing with that long cruel scimitar

nip over to troy, bit of rough and tumble, big horse, bish bash bosh, back home to ithaca. simple as

Actually I've decided this is a poem

Ugh I was developing my wizard film and accidentally cast sepia filter on all of new england. sorry everyone

Official Post of Massachusetts