Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
d e v o n
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year

blake kathryn
RMH
trying on a metaphor

styofa doing anything
Misplaced Lens Cap
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Monterey Bay Aquarium
KIROKAZE
Mike Driver
dirt enthusiast

shark vs the universe


titsay
NASA
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@constant--headache

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Hey guys I found a picture of Ampharos sitting down last night and I’m losing my fucking mind
FUCKING ASTOUNDING
“I’m not lazy. I’m just exhausted from fighting my way through every single day.”
— Mimi love
security question: what was the last name of your first grade teacher?
my first grade teacher hacking my bank account: i’m in
why is this so fucking funny
it’s a joke

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last semester i was at a party and i checked my phone for the time and this guy took a glance at my lock screen over my shoulder and said “is that naruto?” and my drunk ass turned around and said “you know him?”
Okay so I’m watching my friend’s cats while she’s away and she left me descriptions so I could tell who’s who
They’re pretty accurate
I don’t believe in astrology but one time when I was in college I was complaining about how dumb astrology was and after a while someone on the train went “Shut the hell up and let people have fun you Capricorn sun, Virgo moon bitch” and I was like what the fuck
Then I went home and looked it up and they were right so I don’t say anything anymore
My mattress is strapped to eight roombas and I leave all my doors open at night so the roombas can go where they want to. I wake up where they want me to be. I trust their decisions.
say what you want, but this shit was better than the scene in legally blonde when elle wins her case
elle and jake wouldn’t make it a competition, they’d want us to appreciate the other for doing a darn good job.

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This is the funniest thing I’ve seen in weeks. Literally, I’ve never been this funny in my entire goddamn life
“wrong! you owe me seven dollars”
“WHA -HA-ADO YOU MEAAAN????”
this man gives off wildly chaotic trickster fey vibes
“WRONG IT’S THE KING OF DIAMONDS! YOU JUST GOTTA LISTEN!”
This is someone you would find in a dark alley dressed as a wizard
THIS IS PURE GOLD
I would not trust this man in my house
who just sent me money “for being perfect”
turns out boys r useful 4 sumthin
^ yup.
Reblog to let your followers know it’s okay to send you $40 for “being perfect”
I’ll also accept $20 for “being pretty okay”
I’d take $10 for “She’s alright most of the time, I guess”
I’ll take $5 for “she’s okay when she’s not posting stuff”
$2.50 for “Completes autonomic biological functions adequately”
someone just sent me 69¢ and you know what that means:
I will accept 10 cents for being a bitch
if u ever find a genie and you’re really craving a dessert that looks like this:
do NOT say “i’d like a lifetime supply of raspberry crowns”
while this is, in fact, the name of the pastry, it’s ALSO the name of a species of wasp for some reason. the genie, being a nasty trickster, will no doubt give you a bunch of wasps.
this is an oddly specific post are you ok
some people have all the luck. [source]
In case anyone is curious, you can put 27 toddler socks on a lazy cat and she won’t move.
23 ski caps and didn’t budge. 😺
Four remotes a box of floss and a battery.
Another cat
many oranges

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A masterpiece
Put this in the MoMA