Subterranean Homesick Gamer

motherfuckers arent ready for my famous "quadruple-edged sword". second it comes out the holster, blender maneuver. red paste. spin cycle. myself included. nonnegotiable. the SECOND i am frightened WE. ALL. DIE.

the puirpose of a spider is what it does

it spides

Found my 53yo very-much-not-online father in the kitchen today meticulously arranging cutlery on the countertop and i was like 'what are you doing' and he looked up at me with the world's most shit-eating grin and said "Your mother told me this is how you rick-roll the Youth" and i looked over and it was fucking. Loss.jpg.

i must stress that he's never seen the original comic. My mother simply showed him the shorthand symbol and he memorized it. As far as he is aware this is just a fucking hieroglyph that deals instant psychic damage to everyone under the age of 30

im obsessed with the world of donkey kong, where the "barrel" is an abstracted, functionless object that seems to just manifest in the wild

ladies and slenderman

I work cybersecurity, this is like half my job.

the whole vaccine deal tbh

antidepressants

Yes these are all the work of wizards

*introducing myself to the guards who caught me* seized to meet you

shit Saruman would yell at Gandalf during their wizard battle in that gay tower