ChocolateVolcano

a moment of silence for my roommate who has to endure me doing linguistics homework. out loud. making sounds with parts of my mouth and throat I didn’t even realise I could use to make sounds. repeatedly and with passion

i think the moment of silence needs to come directly from you on this one

Normally I do not give a fuck about my age matching or surpassing that of timeless fictional characters. Can’t even understand why someone would be bothered by that. However, in the new James Bond video game, Bond very casually and conversationally references SpongeBob, and it hit me like a fish fired from a rail gun.

being a kid and hearing adults say stuff like "woah 2011 was 4 years ago haha" didn't really convey the fucking horror of a youtube video crossing my recommended labelled "9 years ago" and it's from 2017. that's not true. 9 years ago is 2010 or something. don't lie.

@apocrypals

Hi, pope expert here. This isn’t funny — popes only do this when they’re in extreme distress

We're all in extreme distress, he's not special.

WE LITERALLY CANNOT HAVE 1 NORMAL ANIMAL.

i was speaking with a guy i work with and when leaving i said okay see you monday and he went oh no i wont be in monday. im going bald. and i said ?you're what? and he just repeated im going bald monday. wont be in

update: he didn’t show up on Monday and on Tuesday he was bald

[Image ID: Headline from IFLScience reading: "You Wouldn't Steal a Movie" Advert May Have Led To More People Stealing Movies /End ID]

Fun fact! Both the music and the font in that ad were incorrectly sourced and did not provide compensation to the creators

[ image description: An illustration of Neal Caffrey from White Collar, shown from the shoulders up wearing a black vest over a white shirt and black tie, looking slightly away from the viewer and with faint stubble. / end description ]

How quickly we forget the dangerous crow boy who’s job it is to destroy plastic

Swing state gothic

granted i havent read lotr since i was 13 but the way legolas joins the fellowship always cracks me up, like hes literally a prince but they sent him as a messenger to basically tell the council like "whoopsiedoodles we fucked up and gollum is gone, that's what you get for entrusting him to the party elves of mirkwood you know how we get" and he feels SO bad he joins this super deadly quest like imagine you're thranduil and you're like "hey son can you go to elrond's house and tell him we fucked up royally" and your son is like sure pops can do but then you don't hear from him for like two months so you call elrond like hey e-dog what's good have you seen my son. and elrond is like. well i dont know how to tell you this but he went on a homoerotic voyage to the most dangerous place on earth. id be so mad