Mike Driver

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@catchandelier

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Giant Mozzarella Sticks
Cut to the core
my brother and I get on bandcamp and click on songs from the live updating list of albums that are selling and we listen to 30 seconds or so of a song and if we like it we add it to a playlist. and we call this "foraging for music."
anyways one of terminology we have coined to talk about music is "Knee Music" which is derived from the fact that album covers that show a person's knees tend to sound the same as each other. It's kind of a sleepy, grungy indie folk pop sound with youthful-sounding, vocals that affect a candid and vulnerable feeling.
or anyway we found multiple album covers with knees in quick succession, and they all sounded the same, hence "Knee Music"
but it doesn't have to be knees to be Knee Music. any kind of blurry, candid-looking photos that include skinny white people is likely to be knee music
My other brother's method of foraging for music is slightly more complicated: he gets on everynoise and uses random number generators to get a random genre, a random artist, and then a random song from that artist.
For a while, his method was slightly different, instead choosing a random genre and listening to it until he found a song from that genre that he liked.
However, this could be very time-consuming. once he became trapped for a long time in "geek rap" which was mostly a lot of people rapping in potentially spanish or portuguese (?) about Five Nights at Freddy's
My brother and I have a rating system where we rate songs on a scale of 1 to 7, where 1 is absolute dogshit and 7 is the best song ever.
The challenge in this is that even if a song isn't particularly pleasant to listen to, novelty will increase the rating, because it's something interesting we haven't heard before. So, it's incredibly difficult for a song to get the lowest rating, because a song that is outstandingly bad has something different about it to make it bad, which paradoxically makes it good.
We had a very hard time rating this song, Burial Etiquette- Ivy Staircase in Ruin. We both disliked it, but we had never disliked a song in this way. The harsh vocals are so far to the background and relatively quiet that it's like, a kind of generic song but there's a guy screaming incoherently somewhere in the next room
We didn't like the harsh vocals, but we also thought they should raise the rating of the song because they made it weirder. We ultimately didn't settle on a rating at all for it.
We both agree that the best random song we found is Butcher Brown- No Way Around It. It is groovy and makes you want to dance, with a unique style.
The genre is Funk, so we looked into funk some more, but it turns out that funk is not very popular anymore and it was popular mostly in the 1970s.
Only one other random song we rated with a 7, which is Thrailkill- Cattywampus.
Those are the two songs we rated with a 7. I haven't counted up how many songs we rated yet, but the ratings suggest that an excellent song is hard to find...
The random songs we rated with a 6 are these. a 6 rating means it is a really good song that we would listen to again and again but not the most excellent song possible
Benny Bleu- Five Miles from Town
Death Threat Cassette- Use Your Delusion
@red-naxe
(Regarding the song Burial Etiquette- Ivy Staircase in Ruin)
exactly! weird art has a charm and fascination to it.
that's the secret sauce baybeh

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reading this deposition that just got dropped where someone sued musk and ohhhh my god it is this funniest thing ever . i can see why his lawyer tried to keep this confidential . they’re both maybe the biggest idiots . this is like ace attorney
Musk is being sued for falsely suggesting a 22-year-old Jewish man was part of a neo-Nazi brawl.
Elon Musk was deposed in a recent lawsuit for falsely linking a 22-year-old Jewish man to a neo-Nazi brawl. Musk, who attempted to keep the
PLEASE read this
bankston is my HERO he’s tearing these people apart
damn
HE LEFT
????
oh my god
KILL HIM
he is DONE.
HELP ME .
wow. ok.
genuinely first two pages he says that he thinks ben’s lawyer is the one who is actually suing him and admits he has no clue what the lawsuit is about .
doing a reread now this is so cunty
goddamn .
fun fact: the Mr. Bankston here is Mark Bankston, the same lawyer who absolutely ruined Alex Jones during the Sandy Hook trial.
how in the fuck did the muskrat's attorney pass the bar
Mark Bankston is gonna make me fucking SWOON.
I don't think Mark can ever top "INDEED, MR. JONES, INDEED" and "AND THAT IS HOW I KNOW YOU LIED TO ME" from the first Sandy Hook trial in Texas (not to be confused with Chris Mattei, the attorney in the Connecticut trial), but this part
MR. SPIRO: Do you give these lectures at all of your depositions? MR. BANKSTON: I do, and you can watch them.
is ESPECIALLY hilarious to me having listened to multiple depositions Mark has had to take in the Sandy Hook case, where he has needed to lecture EVERY. SINGLE. ATTORNEY. at some point in the case about how they're violating Texas Rule XYZ, because they all, to a one, did something seriously ethically questionable during the deposition.
like, YOU CAN WATCH/LISTEN TO HIS DEPOS. HE DOES HAVE TO GIVE THOSE LECTURES EVERY TIME. IT'S NOT EVEN A JOKE.
turns out when you specifically seek out extremely pathetic and clumsy women to be your knights and maids they arent very good at being knights or maids
you think you’re so funny don’t you. GUARDS. OFF WITH H- no- no its okay dont cry guards its okay im sorry i raised my voice its okay no im not mad at you
Strange racists and homophobes on the internet seem to have access to an alternate way cooler version of TV than me. "every white character on TV is in an interracial relationship" "every show has a gay couple in it" "main characters keep having to secretly be bisexual and nonbinary" "every show has gratuitous full frontal nudity" like damn promise?? What channel???
as a black gay person real like where y'all be finding this stuff pass the name
for real though, those DO NOT WATCH OR YOU'LL CORRUPT YOUR CHILDREN lists put out by conservative christian family groups is where I find all the stellar tv shows. Like, shit I didn't know half of those existed, thanks for finding them for me, gonna go watch 30 hours of gay tv now!
I think I know how this works.
For personal context, before I went to the '98 Burning Man festival, one of the things I'd read from a couple different journalists was that "everybody" runs around naked. Which, fine by me, I'd already spent a lot of time in clothing-optional spaces, I'm not fanatic about it but it's nice.
So I got there early and set up a public shade structure on one of Black Rock City's main roads and spent most of each afternoon just watching the crowds go by. I don't remember seeing more than one actually naked person the whole week. I think a topless woman passed by my intersection maybe every half an hour, sometimes once an hour. So why in the hell were people, normally pretty smart and observant writers, coming away with the impression that everybody was naked?
Then I remembered an unrelated passage from Joel Garreau's great book about the history of the outer-ring suburbs, Edge City. Mall developers told him flat-out that they tried to keep the crowds in their malls less than 5% black. Not because they themselves were racist, but because they had determined, experimentally, that if more than 5% of the people in the mall are black, the median white shopper will wrongly describe the mall as at least half black, as mostly black. And not a few of them would describe it, at 6% black, as a mall where "only black people go." Why?
Because, emotionally, they were still upset over the last one when the next one came into view.
Same as the journalists describing Black Rock City as all naked. Same as the right-wing religious culture warriors describing television as entirely mixed-race and gender non-conforming. Not because it's even vaguely true, we know that, but because they haven't gotten over their discomfort over the last one by the time the next one comes along. The anger, not the stimulus, is the part that's continuous, so their mind lies to them that it's "all" the thing they can't get over.
Similar effect for the presence/proportion of women in things, by the way: https://health.howstuffworks.com/mental-health/human-nature/perception/how-17-equals-496-the-amazing-multiplying-women.htm
Because, emotionally, they were still upset over the last one when the next one came into view.
this has rewired some neural pathways for me
i really genuinely wish I could hit chatgpt with my bare fists and hear its pityful electronic voice fade into glitched robotic gibberish and choking beeps as I hit it before I smash it for good and it shuts the fuck up forever
no no it's fine
why are so many people wondering if I'm horny for chatgpt. it's like the most unfuckable robot ever created heeell NO
dragging you out of the tags like it's the last thing I'll ever do on this site
ADHD advice from non-ADHD people: start blocking out your day and put things in your google calendar
ADHD advice from ADHD people: any time you're waiting for your food to microwave YOU HAVE TO WASH DISHES WASH AS MANY AS YOU CAN THIS IS A RACE AGAINST TIME THIS IS THE ONLY TIME THIS COULD HAPPEN

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no one loves middle aged women more than lesbians and the thing is we’re so right
thank you seong gi-hun and hwang in-ho
one day, i hope to be moved from your downloads folder into somewhere more deliberate

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hey guysss so unfortunately the rumors are true and im leaving the narrative. Buttt the good news is my absence will create such a gaping hole in your lives that it will become a sort of presence itself, and so in a way it will kind of be like i never left! But i am. Leaving just to be clear.
furiously searching online "what do animals do out in a rainstorm" while it's raining
nobody worry too much because they all produce various oils and have different densities of fur to keep them dry and warm as well as seek out shelter under thick vegetation