I can feel the righteousness surging

like jim commands the gold team and chekov and sulu are his go to guys and they get all super pumped and buy the gold team like matching headbands or something and they talk shit about all the other teams constantly even tho they have never actually won

spock commands the blue team with bones as his first officer and its the only time in the whole year where there is no arguing like those two are in sync and out for total domination but nurse chapel is the biggest threat last year she faked being captured by gold team  - escaped - stole the flag and ran like hell back to their home base (which is the med-bay - gold has the bridge and red has engineering) with spock and bones as her back up and won it for the blue team (a red shirt gave her the finger when she made it back to base and chapel just twirled her skirt at him and told him to kiss her ass)

some think scotty commands red but its actually uhura and she loses her fucking mind over this game like the red team has a battle cry which is basically just mindless screaming and gave out three black eyes last year 

The Shigir Idol

“A mysterious wooden idol found in a Russian peat bog has been dated to 11,000 years ago - and contains a code no one can decipher. 

The Shigir Idol is twice as old as the Pyramids and Stonehenge - and is by far the oldest wooden structure in the world. Even more mysteriously, it is covered in what experts describe as ‘encrypted code’ - a message from a lost civilisation. Professor Mikhail Zhilin of the Russian Academy of Sciences’ Institute of Archeology said: ‘The ornament is covered with nothing but encrypted information. People were passing on knowledge with the help of the Idol.’ Russian experts think that the strange carvings may contain a belief system, the equivalent of the Bible’s Genesis. The statue had been dated as being 9,500 years old, after its discovery in a peat bog 125 years ago. But new research in Mannheim, Germany used Accelerated Mass Spectrometry n small fragments of the sculpture, and found it is at least 11,000 years old. That means the sculpture dates from the very beginning of the Holocene epoch - the era when man rose to dominate the world.’

Originally posted by gameraboy

No, but this is:

- killed a guy, then gave his job to the guy right next to him

- did a triple front-flip over a stream of lava, only to get most of his limbs cut off

- took on an entire army of rebels by himself, and when told he was surrounded, said “all i’m surrounded by is fear and dead men”. talk about edgy

- announced he was luke’s father, barely seconds after amputating his hand, then was disappointed that luke wanted nothing to do with him

- every entrance he makes he always has to be in a dark corner or surrounded by fog with his cape billowing perfectly behind him. how Does he do it

- made a terrible pun about choking, while choking a guy

-flown a tie fighter with the force just so he could stand atop it and look dramatic

-Setting up a whole dinner for Leia, Han, & Chewie just to trap them

-Stopping blaster bolts with his hand

-Force choking a guy through a TV screen, across a starship

He recognizes that Obi-Wan wanted to help him. And rather than blaming Obi-Wan for fucking him up, he essentially shoulders the blame as that gifted child for being impossible to help. He actually blames Obi-Wan only for optimism. His destiny, after all, was predetermined. Obi-Wan thought otherwise, but that is not a crime worthy of hatred.

And I kind of get on about this because I think there is literally no canon evidence that Vader directed hatred or energy toward killing Obi-Wan between their duels. Rewind from their pitiful duel on the Death Star, and what do you have? Twenty years of Obi-Wan living in peaceful exile. The EU conjures up reasons for why Vader personally did not hunt down all the Jedi, both creating Inquisitors for us and at times having Palpatine personally counsel against it as a detriment to Vader’s growth as a Sith. But the point remains that Vader did not focus pursuit on Obi-Wan. Rewind further to the duel on Mustafar. Amid Anakin’s ranting, he tells Obi-Wan “Don’t make me kill you.” He waits for a solid declaration of intent from Obi-Wan that a fight must commence. That is not obsession and it is not drive to see Obi-Wan’s death. While they both prepare for the duel they know is inevitable, on both sides, they require that last push to make them fight. It is not an uneven assault where only Anakin pursues combat because he specifically wishes for Obi-Wan to die.

Back to their final, pitiful duel. I know that people like to characterize it as murder since, well, murder and heavy breathing are pretty much what Vader does best. It only barely fits the criteria, since Obi-Wan not only lowers his weapon, but outright declares that when Vader strikes him down, he will become more powerful. He intends for it to happen. Vader is the instrument of his suicide.

carrie: *actually acting* no luke, it’s too late!

harrison: *in that same monotone voice* … bang. bang.

I used to work for a call center and I was doing a political survey and I called this number that was randomly generated for me and the way our system worked was voice-activated so when the other person said hello you’d get connected to them, so I just launch right into my “Harvard University and NPR blah blah blah” thing and then there’s this long pause and I think the person’s hung up even though I didn’t hear a click

And then I hear “you shouldn’t be able to call this number.”

So I apologize and go into the preset spiel about because we aren’t selling anything, etc. etc. and the answer I get is

“No, I know that. What I mean is that it should be impossible for you to call this number, and I need to know how you got it.”

I explain that it’s randomly generated and I’m very sorry for bothering him, and go to hang up. And before I can click terminate, I hear:

“Ma’am, this is a matter of national security.”

I accidentally called the director of the FBI.

There was no MS Dos involved. Instead, there was a proprietary type-based OS and an actually-uses-transistors refrigerator-sized computer with switches I had to trip at certain times during the night as I watched the data flow from six pm to six AM on Fridays and weekends. If things got stuck, I reset the server. 

The company handled everything from low-end data (hotel and car reservations) to flight plans and tower information. I was weighed every time I came in to make sure it was me. Areas of the building had retina scanners on doors. 

During training. they took us through all the procedures. Including the procedures for the red phone. There was, literally, a red phone on the shelf above my desk. “This is a holdover from the cold war.” They said. “It isn’t going to come up, but here’s the deal. In case of nuclear war or other nation-wide disaster, the phone will ring. Pick up the phone, state your name and station, and await instructions. Do whatever you are told.”

So my third night there, it’s around 2am and there’s a ringing sound. 

I look up, slowly. The Red phone is ringing.

So I reach out, I pick up the phone. I give my name and station number. And I hear every station head in the building do the exact same. One after another, voices giving names and numbers. Then silence for the space of two breaths. Silence broken by…

“Uh… Is Shantavia there?”

It turns out that every toll free, 1-900 or priority number has a corresponding local number that it routs to at its actual destination. Some poor teenage girl was trying to dial a friend of hers, mixed up the numbers, and got the atomic attack alert line for a major air-travel corporation’s command center in the mid-west United States.

There’s another pause, and the guys over in the main data room are cracking up. The overnight site head is saying “I think you have the wrong number, ma’am.” and I’m standing there having faced the specter of nuclear annihilation before I was old enough to legally drink.

Seriously, this is legit.

In December 1955, Sears decided to run a Santa hotline.  Here’s the ad they posted.

Only problem is, they misprinted the number.  And the number they printed?  It went straight through to fucking NORAD.  This was in the middle of the Cold War, when early warning radar was the only thing keeping nuclear annihilation at bay.  NORAD was the front line.

And it wasn’t just any number at NORAD.  Oh no no no.

Terri remembers her dad had two phones on his desk, including a red one. “Only a four-star general at the Pentagon and my dad had the number,” she says.

“This was the ‘50s, this was the Cold War, and he would have been the first one to know if there was an attack on the United States,” Rick says.

The red phone rang one day in December 1955, and Shoup answered it, Pam says. “And then there was a small voice that just asked, ‘Is this Santa Claus?’ ”

His children remember Shoup as straight-laced and disciplined, and he was annoyed and upset by the call and thought it was a joke — but then, Terri says, the little voice started crying.

“And Dad realized that it wasn’t a joke,” her sister says. “So he talked to him, ho-ho-ho’d and asked if he had been a good boy and, ‘May I talk to your mother?’ And the mother got on and said, ‘You haven’t seen the paper yet? There’s a phone number to call Santa. It’s in the Sears ad.’ Dad looked it up, and there it was, his red phone number. And they had children calling one after another, so he put a couple of airmen on the phones to act like Santa Claus.”

“It got to be a big joke at the command center. You know, ‘The old man’s really flipped his lid this time. We’re answering Santa calls,’ ” Terri says.

And then, it got better.

“The airmen had this big glass board with the United States on it and Canada, and when airplanes would come in they would track them,” Pam says.

“And Christmas Eve of 1955, when Dad walked in, there was a drawing of a sleigh with eight reindeer coming over the North Pole,” Rick says.

“Dad said, ‘What is that?’ They say, ‘Colonel, we’re sorry. We were just making a joke. Do you want us to take that down?’ Dad looked at it for a while, and next thing you know, Dad had called the radio station and had said, ‘This is the commander at the Combat Alert Center, and we have an unidentified flying object. Why, it looks like a sleigh.’ Well, the radio stations would call him like every hour and say, ‘Where’s Santa now?’ ” Terri says.

For real.

“And later in life he got letters from all over the world, people saying, ‘Thank you, Colonel,’ for having, you know, this sense of humor. And in his 90s, he would carry those letters around with him in a briefcase that had a lock on it like it was top-secret information,” she says. “You know, he was an important guy, but this is the thing he’s known for.”

“Yeah,” Rick [his son] says, “it’s probably the thing he was proudest of, too.”

So yeah.  I think that might be the best wrong number of all time.

An Exotic Dancer Demonstrates That Her Underwear Was Too Large To Have Exposed Herself, After Undercover Police Officers Arrested Her In Florida

Dorothy Counts – The First Black Girl To Attend An All-White School In The United States – Being Teased And Taunted By Her White Male Peers At Charlotte’s Harry Harding High School, 1957

Austrian Boy Receives New Shoes During WWII

Jewish Prisoners After Being Liberated From A Death Train, 1945

The Graves Of A Catholic Woman And Her Protestant Husband, Holland, 1888

A Lone Man Refusing To Do The Nazi Salute, 1936

Job Hunting In 1930’s

German Soldiers React To Footage Of Concentration Camps, 1945

Residents Of West Berlin Show Children To Their Grandparents Who Reside On The Eastern Side, 1961

Acrobats Balance On Top Of The Empire State Building, 1934

Mafia Boss Joe Masseria Lays Dead On A Brooklyn Restaurant Floor Holding The Ace Of Spades, 1931

Lesbian Couple At Le Monocle, Paris, 1932

The Most Beautiful Suicide – Evelyn Mchale Leapt To Her Death From The Empire State Building, 1947

The Remains Of The Astronaut Vladimir Komarov, A Man Who Fell From Space, 1967

Race Organizers Attempt To Stop Kathrine Switzer From Competing In The Boston Marathon. She Became The First Woman To Finish The Race, 1967

Harold Whittles Hearing Sound For The First Time, 1974

Turns out people really like me waffling about Narnia on Twitter.

So here’s a more hopeful spin on Susan Pevensie. (From the author’s pen to your eyeballs.)