Why are British teenage girls so unhappy? Hereâs the answer (Caitlin Moran, The Times, Sep 13 2024)
"The report, by the Childrenâs Society, found that British 15-year-old girls are the most unhappy in Europe.
British girls aged 10-15 are âsignificantly less happyâ with their life, appearance, family and school than the average boy â and their happiness is still declining.
Boysâ life satisfaction, meanwhile, remains broadly stable. (âŚ)
But I still didnât have an âaha!â moment about why this so disproportionately affects girls until⌠I talked to some teenage girls.
It was at a party, and I went to vape with them on the patio. Because I take my nicotine like children do.
âDuh â itâs the boys,â one said when I brought it up, as all the others agreed.
My last book, What About Men?, had been all about how much boys struggle these days: their loneliness; their suicide rates. Iâd spent the past year feeling very sympathetic towards boys.
âYeah, well, who do you think theyâre taking out their unhappiness on? Itâs us,â another girl said.
âOne boy at school used to draw a picture every day of how ugly I was,â a third girl said. âEvery day for two years.â
âTheyâve all got âRate The Girlsâ polls on their WhatsApps,â the first said. âThey mark you down for weight gain, haircuts, what you say.â
âBut then, if youâre hot, itâs just as bad, in a different way, because theyâll be talking about how they want to f*** you.â
The girls discussed coping techniques. Bad news: none of them worked.
âThe only way you can stop them is if you become âone of the boysâ and hang out with them. But then,â the second girl said with a sigh, âall the other girls call you a slut. Because youâve gone over to the boysâ side.â
âSurely itâs not all the boys?â I said. âThere must be some nice boys?â
âOh, yeah,â one girl said. âBut they keep their heads down. Because⌠well, look.â
She showed me the Instagram account of her friend. Under every picture she posted of herself â smiling in a new dress; with her dog â dozens of anonymous accounts had replied with the most rank abuse.
âFat.â âSlut.â âYou gonna try and kill yourself again, for attention?â
âTheyâre all boys from her school,â she said. âAnd look, this one boy tried to defend her.â
I saw a series of messages from a brave teenage boy, posting things like, âYouâre all big men, leaving these replies under anonymous accounts.â
As I could see, this boy immediately became a target too. Mainly accusations that he was âwhite knightingâ this girl: âYou wanna f*** her, bro?â
âSo,â I asked, âyou donât think itâs social media pressure to be beautiful, or the economy, thatâs making girls so sad?â
âWell, yeah, them too,â the first girl said. âBut, Monday-Friday, 9-3, Iâm not on social media. Iâm not⌠in the economy. Iâm just with these boys. And no one talks about how horrible they are.â
I thought about another recent report, showing a 30 per cent ideological gap between Gen Z men, who are increasingly conservative, and Gen Z women, who are increasingly progressive.
I thought about Andrew Tate, who has nine million mostly young male followers â and faces human trafficking charges, which he denies.
And I thought: maybe these girls are on to something. Maybe more people need to vape with teenage girls and ask them for the school gossip."