Darling, forever is a long, long time.

we would be so lost without garlic

can yall just like. be nice to each other. i PROMISE being vile and horrible isn’t worth it in the long run. like i promise being mean will not make you happier. being intentionally mean-spirited doesn’t make you cool and likeable. 

being mean and insulting towards everyone isn’t a personality. it doesn’t make you cool. it just makes you that one girl that got hit by a bus in mean girls.

i seem to have misplaced my emotional support frog

Vegetables are delicious, u guys just don’t know how to cook

can they like release new vegetables 

i work at whole foods and im here to tell u that they do

Do y'all remember being a kid and trying to read in the car while it was dark outside and your parents wouldn’t let you turn on the light so you would try to grab snatches of sentences when you passed by street lights

holy fuck

holy fuck is right… but… does it work with legs???

but how much extend

^^^^^^^^^^

I NEARLY CHOKED

ENJFDFNFATFVFDF

Norwegian prisons are nicer than my apartment.

I was really shocked by this and dubious, so I decided to read further. There’s a great article about this here: http://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-35813470 As it turns out, this is more like a halfway house. Prisoners usually begin their term in a prison more like one we’d typically recognize - bars on the windows, locked in their cells. But the emphasis there is on successful reintegration into society.  As their sentence progresses, with good behavior, they can move into a facility more like this, where their freedoms are still restricted, but they can do things like network with people outside of prison, search for employment, cook and clean and look after themselves, and begin making plans for their reintegration into society.  As a result, Norway has one of the lowest rates of recidisvism. 20% as opposed to America’s 76%.  It seems like a shocking idea to us because of where and how we live, but apparently, Norwegians are addressing the real problem. When you take people who can’t function well in society, and then…help them do that?…they….do. Without the crime-ing. 

Turns out treating people like human beings makes them more likely to act like human beings….

But won’t that incentivize some people to go back there since they get treated so well and get a nice room versus the streets?

If you read the post above, it says Norway’s recidivism rate - that is, the rate of released criminals who go on to be arrested again - is 20% versus 76% in the United States, so for the most part, no.

Isn’t that white-lined black cross on a red field flag a Nazi flag? Are we going to talk about how wonderful it is a Nazi gets a nice halfway house?

THE WORST THING ABOUT PRISON WAS THE DEMENTORS

We don’t deserve dogs ❤️😂

so my roomates girlfriend just caught me in the kitchen and its so hard to play it cool when you never see this person you only hear her yowling like a cat in heat while her asshole gets played with so me, trying to act as casual as i possibly could, forgot i was holding an onion and not a delightful apple and bit into it fully expecting a honeycrisp but instead got the equiv of biting solid piss 

lol wtaf. i can’t read a single word of this paragraph