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Hey you NERBS. I'm the Ex-Mayo(r) of my town (friend group.) I finally finished my term I'm free.
24, Bi Aroace, He/they
Professional monster smoocher, girlboss stan, and murderboy enthusiast.
These were from Bulbapedia but there IS a dedicated Glitch pokemon Wiki over here
It's an archive based on Glitch City Labs which was unfortunately shut down in 2020. Still a great resource for learning about any and all things Glitch Pokemon.
Believe it or not, it was even better when it was a dedicated site. I knew the guy who ran it a long time ago through a forum actually. Really cool dude. Sad to see the site go, but it's understandable.
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Very odd and specific question, so absolutely feel free to ignore, but - do you have any advice on dealing with people treating you as if you’re a cis guy post-medical transition? Specifically, with all of the weird camaraderie around performing casual misogyny?
I just moved for work from the city I’ve lived in all my life - I medically transitioned a few years ago and now pass as cis, but since all of my friends, family, colleagues, etc. were pretty much all aware that I was trans, I’ve never really been treated as a cis man by other cis men. I’m now in a new city where I know nobody and nobody knows me, and I am apparently passing not only as cis but also as straight (which I am not), and for the first time I’m encountering, like, generalised misogyny/homophobia/etc that I am expected to participate in, rather than it being either directly or indirectly pointed towards me.
Obviously I don’t want to participate, but it’s insanely difficult to find a way to disagree without potentially outing myself (I’m not deliberately stealth and don’t want to be, but I’m still cautious about who I tell). I don’t think I’d be exposed to violence, but I’m also not particularly interested in being either ostracised or a teaching tool for casual bigots.
Once again, PLEASE feel free to ignore this, but you seem like you might have some expertise.
I think about this a lot, and my advice is going to be colored by the fact that I actually physically intimidate a lot of cis men.
Something about my height, default frowning expression, how I carry myself, and yes, being white and dressing more formally, has conditioned a lot of cis men to defer to me out of reflex. Though sometimes, the occasional "alpha" asshole will want to start shit.
I like to combine my physicality with certain mannerisms to instill a type of cognitive dissonance in toxic men that short circuits them.
Most of my examples are from the white collar workplace, because that's where I socialize the most with cishet men.
I like peppering my language and appearance with softness. I still swear like a sailor, but may suddenly say something like, "I need to bail for the night because my tummy is upset." When I used to lead Very Important meetings with Very Important Men, I enjoyed seeing eyes bulge when I put my laptop covered with colorful stickers on the table.
This is just how I am, so I was broadcasting, "I am not like you," without adopting an artificial persona. Ie, a lot of people will give "gay it up" advice here, but I am not flamboyant in the way they encourage.
(I will say that changing my style to be more ostentatious -- dressing 1940s vintage in my case -- does make more people assume I am gay.)
I avoid a lot of "pissing contest" body language with men -- I may opt for a wave instead of an aggressive handshake. I don't do that "lean back in the chair with arms behind the head" or other man-spreading around the conference table. The more a man raises his voice, the quieter and calmer I present. And when I'm in a mixed gender conversation, I make sure I let the folks who are not men speak.
Overall, I still take up space, but I act like I know I'm strong and capable without feeling the need to prove it.
(Yes, I am aware this can all ironically all be considered as still engaging in the pissing contest. There is a balance between ignoring this behavior and engaging with it on a different level.)
When toxic men try to buddy up to me with their nonsense, I take great care not to parrot misogynistic/queerphobic/etc idioms. For example, as a married man in a cishet presenting relationship, I avoid "ball and chain" gags. In fact, I may talk about my next date night or something cool my partner did during the icebreaker part of a conversation. This is an example of how I subvert expected shitty behavior before shitty men try to enlist me in it.
Sometimes, it's necessary to call out their bullshit. "What an odd thing to say." "Sounds like a skills issue." "I don't understand the joke." This takes some practice to do, and you want to be sure you're not going to have your ass beat. Sometimes, just removing yourself from the situation is what is best.
When I have to be confrontational, I tend to adopt a flat affect. Men expect other men in an argument to become angry, flustered, or smug. Showing zero emotion confuses the shit out of them and I've literally had aggressive men wanting to physically fight me turn and walk away.
In short, if you scrub a lot of toxic behaviors from yourself, you're going to throw toxic men off-guard. Don't rise to their bait, be it body language or defaulting to stereotypical phrases. Avoid these guys when you can, and confront them when it's important to make a point.
This is all very hard to make a habit, because we internalize a lot of the scripts to toxic masculinity. There's a lot to unlearn.
Again, I say this from a place where I have some social currency going into these interactions because of how I look. Being a little intimidating means I can come off as off-putting and not suffer much for it.
“Please consider how amatonormativity/compulsory sexuality/allonormativity might be impacting your perspective on this” is not at all the same thing as insulting someone, attacking them, or calling them a bigot, FYI.
That being said, please always take time to reflect and consider how amatonormativity/compulsory sexuality/allonormativity might impact your perspective on things like fandom, shipping, media analysis, real life relationships, politics, and everything in between.
missing The Character is a strange thing because yea there's always the option to go back to their source material or looking at art or reading fics but it's also like i can't just call them up like i would a friend to see how they're doing and that's the frustrating part of it
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crazy how every time a female character gets cliche misogynistic writing we have to explain to people again that fictional characters are not real and do not choose things for themselves.
The thing about the goon app is that goons fall into exactly two categories: either they are your buddies or they are Blackwater. If you are a normal person who needs goons like a drug dealer or someone with a stalker you call your buddies and your buddies roll up with whatever equipment they got. If you are wealthy you have no real friends so you have to call Mr Prince. Almost all of the time the goons are matched to the situation because your buddies are perforce people who get into the same sort of situations you do. There is no middle ground except these Baudrillardian simulacra of goons to be hired by Instagram celebrities and other types of internet pod person. They aren't real goons like yes there are guys there but you can't trust them if there's a real threat but there isn't one so it doesn't matter. The app only appears to be outside the dichotomy if you make the mistake of thinking the hired goons are real.
If you could make a Pokémon, what type would it be and would it look like?
id make a steel/bug pokemon that looks like a train centipede and its cry is a loud as fuck train horn that plays even if you have your console on mute
I miss when ads were a single click and then they’re gone. Now every ad has a minimum of three phases where you watch a video, exit the still frame of fake gameplay, and then exit the app download. That doesn’t even touch on the ones that forcibly take you to another app after opening a tab in safari without you ever touching the screen.
I hate advertising. I hate that you can’t do anything without companies jumping down your throat with mostly bullshit ads. I hate that billboards exist. I hate that every company unanimously decided to make their ads longer and longer. I hate that ad blockers try to charge you money and there are in app purchases to remove ads. I hate that my attention has become commodified. I hate that there’s nothing I can do about it.
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if I see one more "why age verification is bad" post that doesn't even bother to mention that locking young people out of huge sections of the public sphere - literally the stated goal and primary impact of this shit - is wrong in and of itself I will simply start hitting people with bricks
yes yes biometric data privacy blah blah adults can hypothetically by harmed by this too. what about the immediate and deliberate and not at all hypothetical harm to youth. why are you acting like a potential data leak about what your face looks like, which if it ever happened would at least be generally recognised as a problem, is a more serious issue than cutting millions of people off from information and community and public expression which is happening right now in the open with large scale support
it's got the stench of fucking "banned books week" on it. thousands of adults congratulating themselves for reading books literally no one is trying to stop them from reading while doing nothing to improve access for the young people who are the ones actually having those books made off-limits to them.
I work with kids and sometimes we have to do safety lessons with them about like, not telling strangers on the internet your home address or something. And sometimes the kids wont understand why, so you have to impart upon them that, well, some adults want to hurt children. And thats kind of difficult to do, because you have to beat around the bush, both because you dont want to scare them (while still making them understand how serious it is) and because you might lose your job if you explain it too straight forward.
Luckily, for some reason, the villain of one of the most popular franchises with children for the last 10 years happens to be a serial child murderer. So when a kid asks why they shouldnt trust strangers, instead of hand wringing and humhawing my answer out, I can just say "we dont always know when a strange adult has good intentions with children, or when they are William Afton."
hello allo person in a fandom. let’s play a game. in front of you are two characters. your challenge is to okay and you’ve already started shipping them. well the crusher machine is going to activate now goodbye.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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