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@callandanswer
i need (abruptly stops talking & stares at some random fixed point with a vacant expression)

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I'm drawn to playing characters who are terribly flawed and have no idea about it.
Catherine Anne O'Hara (March 4, 1954 โ January 30, 2026)
Revisiting this one todayโฆ
MAY ALL YOUR OBSTACLES COLLAPSE IN THE YEAR TO COME LIKE UNTO A GIANT STRAW GOAT IN THE WIND

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Here, I can take up the whole of the sky / Unfurling, becoming my full size / And look at me burst through the ceiling / Aren't you so glad you came? / Breathless and begging and screaming my name / Screaming my name
FLORENCE + THE MACHINE โ Everybody Scream (dir. Autumn de Wilde, 2025) โง
Florence Welch on connecting with audiences through music and trauma. (x)
Oh you know he said roo roo roo roo
And they look out so hard for the well being of the spiders AND the dolphins
@moss-wizard of course this isnโt how we serve it!!
It has to be in a dish with much higher sides, so when we go to cut it and it tries to sliiiiiide away it doesnโt escape and blorp blorp blorp across momโs nice tablecloth
SLICE YOUR CANNED BOGBERRY GOO INTO DISCS BEFORE SERVING, YOU FILTHY HERETICS.
NO. IT WILL BE SERVED IN PROPER CAN SHAPE, AND WILL HAVE ITSELF SCOOPED INTO WEIRD SHAPES THE WAY THE GODS INTENDED
YOU STAY OUTTA THIS, GOD-QUEEN-EMPEROR. AND TAKE YOUR CERVID STALKERS WITH YOU.
It's supposed to be served in can shape with two discs already sliced and laying tastefully in front
I have consulted the scriptures and this is variation is still within the bounds of orthodoxy.
Mash the can shape up. We giving the table what they want, chaos in a dish, with a serving spoon.
Not to derail the escalating heresy, but what do dolphins have to do with cranberry bogs?
cranberry is served in its can shape in the can direction, not on its side but on its cylinder
Right but you guys know that ocean spray also sells like. Cranberries. Which you can use to make an actually edible cranberry sauce on the stovetop in 10 minutes of unattended cook time
actual cranberries? ew no thank you. The unprocessed chunky stuff is GROSS.
Look, in my house, we mix it with whipped cream and freeze it in a graham cracker crust for dessert!
@oft-goes-awry
what the actual fuck?
@somethinginterestingithink
Behold, my grandmother's recipe for Cranberry Surprise:
For the crust, combine 2/3 cup crushed ginger snap crumbs (put them in a large plastic bag and crumble with a rolling pin, or a mug if you don't have one) with 2 T. of sugar. Press into a 9" pie plate.
For the filling, pour a half-pint of regular whipping cream into a bowl, and beat until stiff. Mix in 2 T. of sugar and 1/2 tsp. of almond extract.
In another bowl, take a 14 oz. CHILLED can of jellied cranberry sauce and mash it with a potato masher if you've got one, or a fork if you don't. (My mom bought me a potato masher specifically so I could make this dessert at holidays without having to borrow hers.)
Once the log is goo, fold the cranberry sauce into the whipped cream mix. Yes, it's supposed to be THAT pink.
Pour the pink cream-and-cranberry mix into the crust and freeze for at least 24 hours. Cut and serve immediately upon removal from freezer.
American Horror Food is one of my favorite tumblr post types.
(I make it from real cranberries but if I decide to go with Goo Log, I mash it like the unorthodox godkiller that I am.)
I can only add that I worked in a deep freeze warehouse for a little bit when I was younger. The cranberries would come in loose around Halloween. This big machine would clean, sort, and dump them into 1000 lb wooden bins that would be forklifted and stacked to freeze in the warehouse.
One time, somebody lost control of a bin and broke it open. I would like you to picture a dozen warehouse workers slip sliding around on frozen cranberry ball bearings for hours, trying to clean them up, while you play Yakety Sax in your head. It was a nightmare.
Doesnโt everyone have a special cranberry-from-the-can serving plate and slice-cutting tool! What, are you all just living live Neanderthals?!?!
Oh my ZOD I love that
my brother is a culinary artist. one year he made some amazing cranberry sauce that nobody touched. the next year he made the same sauce, added a thickener, and set it in a ribbed can (he reused a pumpkin can iirc), and it was a hit.
we like the vague can-shaped fruit gelatin. i personally like it even more when itโs home-made.
Ah, in my house we serve this standing up on a plate, and we call it Invisible Can. It is not a holiday dinner without Invisible Can.
Hello international friends, I am delighted to report all of the above is real :)
Not to come in with a steel chair here, but the ideal pairing for cranberry sauce in all forms, and the meat we *should* be serving at Thanksgiving, rather than easy-to-improperly cook turkey that tastes like napkins, is Lamb.
okay but I still want to know what dolphins have to do with this???
I have consulted The Ancient Texts (aka my mother in law) and have found confirmation that slicing is correct because why else would this exist?
Ten minutes for homemade cranberry sauce??????? What are you on. No. That's 40 minutes minimum and you better be adding pepper flakes and orange juice.
No, cranberry farmers aren't netting and canning dolphins during the harvest season.
How can something as delicate and delicious as a cranberry thrive in something as filthy as a bog? Blame it on the durability of this most u
...
In Germany we just put the cranberries on pears.
As a bitch with texture โจpreferencesโจ the only way I will eat it is jellied and the you have to still see the can lines for optimal flavor.
THE CAN LINES ARE VITAL.
โฆ this is where I admit that I like all forms of cranberry sauce, but am still freaked out by the idea of cranberry bog spiders. That is straight up nightmare fuel.

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If there's one thing I will never understand it's Lord of the Rings fans wanting to be an elf in Middle Earth. I mean, sure they're graceful and pretty but they live too damn long and having to witness an eternity of stupidity from the species around them. Like, imagine being Elrond and basically witnessing a cringe compilation of the human race. Nope. No thanks.
I've been witnessing a cringe compilation of the human race my whole life. Elrond is not special.
I have no words
Me neither (until the soy sauce, when I yelled "FOR FUCKS SAKE" again).
Until the what
57 days tilโ fall friends ๐โ๐ซ๐ชพ๐๐
plane tickets should be Free if you miss yuor friends
maybe growing up is just becoming who you were at 14 again but learning how to love her this time

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i bet there were guys in the 1800s who were super fucking Reddit about everything, but no one had the right word yet for why those guys were so annoying. so they just had to wonder
Der lรคstige Kavalier (The Annoying Gentleman), by Berthold Woltze, 1874.
that is a "hello darkness my old friend" face if I ever saw one.
Cybersmith off his shits
keep in mind also that this girl is
A. A teenager, since her hair is almost fully down (the longer skirt and her traveling alone make me think maybe 14-15), and
B. In mourning, as evidenced by her entirely matte and unornamented black dress, gloves, and hat
so this guy is pestering a young girl who's just lost someone close to her, in absence of clear social cues meant to convey exactly that
I recently saw it pointed out elseTumblr that, a remarkably easy detail to miss, she is going for her hatpin. The clear social cues are about to escalate.
I for one think that is very valid of her and that hatpinning That Guy should still be considered a socially acceptable and perhaps even laudable option.
Back in the early 20th century, hatpins were a go-to self defense weapon for women- which, of course, meant that the government had to start regulating hatpins.
To protect themselves from unwanted advances, city women wielded some sharp accessories