Nikki💖

This is my car I’m crying I’m so happy to finally see it as a post tho I really thot it would be on shitty-car-mods lmfao

This poor honda. It didnt deserve… this.

are you kidding this is my fucking dream car

It’s perfect because no one would be caught dead trying to steal it

I’d just like to point out that the letters on the front bumper say “H-Hewwo!?” if seen in a rear view mirror.

this really is antithetical to everything i stand for. like if you asked me “who are you?” the shortest answer would be showing you this car and assuring you that i would rip the owner apart like a wild chimpanzee given the chance

dude I’m mega proud of the owner because they basically went “Cringe Culture is dead and you can fuck right off!” and shared their entire list of likes on their car

i just wanna know what weed-addicted brunette broke john green’s heart in high school and gave him enough material for a decade’s worth of identical books

WHAT THE HELL DID I JUST HEAR

You heard art.

Taako and Magic Brian had a secret love child (the character saying mmmmyeesss) and he’s eeeeeeeevil.

A lot of people have said I sound like that and/or the villain from Powerpuff Girls, but almost no one has mentioned the guy from The Simpsons who says “ah-YEeeeeEESSSSS”, which is where most of my intonation comes from.

I’m sorry, but the confusion of why your bathroom doesn’t have a door far outweighs any feelings of horror this might evoke.

can’t afford door.. the horror here is the realities of life

So what fuck was your wife knocking on

this dick

It’s not even 4 words???

Fun things they don’t teach you in sex ed.

Talcum powder has asbestos in it. Has for years. Leave it be

I can smell the entitlement in the air

Oregon was a mistake

Oregon, what you doin???

I think I am most bewildered by how many people seem to think that you spend the rest of the day reeking of gas fumes if you touch a gas pump. Do they think you pour the gas all over yourself…? Why are these gas fumes clinging to you through your day such that you will not be fit to be around other humans…? 

I didn’t even know there were places left that let you pump your own gas.

@antyc67 in Britain we pump our own.

I didn’t know there were any stations left where people don’t pump their own gas.  Every gas station I’ve ever seen has been self-service since the 1970s.

I’ve lived in Central Michigan my entire life and i have never heard of people just….not pumping their gas……i’m so fucking confused.

the medical world is so fatphobic that even tho it’s far deadlier to have a low BMI than a high one, a lower-weight patient practically has to be a crumbled pile of bones to elicit any concern from a doctor but a patient who’s even slightly heavy will be told that their weight is a major health risk

I havent had hot cocoa in YEARS

Well it’s probably cold now