I Am Number Pun

All of these are so accurate it hurts

@nicadenic

Did you eat? (I love you) I bought the bread you like (I love you) I noticed you were upset so I brought you tea (I love you) I made this for you (I love you) I know you have a lot of work and can't talk now so I will leave this thing you like around (I love you) I did your chores (I love you) I will sit by in case you need anything (I love you. I love you. I love you)

Just wanna say: nothing could make me hate the bruins. They could lose next game 10-0 with zero shots and I wouldn’t hate them. I love the bruins. I love how much they love each other. I love how much joy they’ve brought us all season long, despite no one thinking they’d succeed. Despite them having to fill the hole of teammates they love. If they’re eliminated I’ll feel awful for them, since obviously every player’s ultimate goal is to win the cup every year, but I refuse to bash them. The season won’t be a waste to me. Because I. Love. The. Bruins.

so real i always think abt this

I know of a trail racing company that gives the slowest racer who finishes every race a DFL award: Dead Fucking Last. I was a little taken aback by this until I had it explained to me that those last-place finishers are pretty much uniformly people for whom finishing at all was an accomplishment: people undergoing cancer treatments, absolute beginners, runners in their eighties, extremely pregnant people, you get the idea. Moreover, what you see as this person crosses the finish line is all these sporty trail racers, many of whom finished the race literal hours earlier, cheering their hearts out because they respect that, yes, DFL is still a place, baby.

Happy earth day

Police vs law enforcement

Look I used to work with tow truck guys and they do not give a fuck. One time the Air Force was doing a recruiting stunt and they decided to bring a plane as like…a prop? I dunno and they parked it in a 20 minute loading zone and 21 minutes later my coworkers IMPOUNDED THE PLANE.

Have you ever had an Air Force general call your office and bitch? He did not expect the tow truck guys.

Ok, I adore the Frogs to begin with, but the sheer finesse and dedication of this one boggles my mind.

the leftism leaving people's bodies when you tell them making fun of someone's appearance is always objectively scummy even if the person they're making fun of is bad

"lol are we really surprised that the dude who said eating puppies is good and morally correct looks like THIS" and then it's just a picture of a completely normal looking person who is fat or has acne or just in general doesn't meet the societally imposed standard of conventional "hotness," which is bizarrely being posited as an indicator of morality