revert to brightstone

an empty mini of fireball is a species of animal found in the US and its invasive habitat is on the ground

My mom likes to tell me about how when I was a little kid riding public transport with her I'd always smile and giggle and chat with weird old ladies who smelled like cat pee and homeless folks and strangers dressed in bizarre outfits but any time a tidy and respectable businessman in a suit and tie waved at me I'd immediately clam up, and she takes a great deal of pride in my supposed inherentability to clock personalities but the truth is I do vaguely remember those bus rides, and it was never about the clothes or the hair or the smell, but more because everyone "strange" asked interesting questions and listened to what I had to say and seemed to think about what I said while the neat and tidy and rigid folks only ever acted like they were going through the motions, which was boring as hell and also pretty annoying

that poll going around of the guy who thought "people only eat tofu as a bit because they're deranged vegans" or whatever really crystalizes something that i have never been able to precisely say - which is "a nonzero fraction of people who start picky-eater discourse just happen to precisely hate those foods which are not from north america and refuse to introspect on this whatsoever"

In contrast some people say "there aren't any picky eaters in Asia 🙄" but this is laughably untrue. I have a cousin in India who refused until his 20s to eat anything in a sauce. as you can imagine in India this was difficult. he basically had to pick things out of curry and wipe them dry

I hate the videoification of everything. If I have to hear one more video of someone speaking closely into their shitty mic and I have to have all their yucky wet mouth noises and plosives and nose whistles and throat clearings and sniffles I am going to dig a vertical hole the exact dimensions of my body and I’m going to slither in head first

as someone with misophonia, the widespread popularization of asmr audio editing + people that are being pushed to make video content with no formal training and have no idea how to edit their audio (ex college professors, average joe tiktokers, etc) is literally my nightmare scenario. this is hell I am in hell

You probably think you could take an octopus to a 3D movie. Maybe you think it would look cute in those little glasses, with a cup of Coca-Cola in one tentacle, some popcorn in another and a bag of candy in a third. I bet you're imagining how when something jumps at the screen, it would get scared and camouflage to the same color as the seat. Well, too bad, 'cause it's never gonna happen. You know why? I'll tell you why. Unlike ours, octopus eyes can see the polarization of light. The two superimposed images wouldn't look similar to it, even a little. You fool. You buffoon. And I know what you're thinking. We'll just watch a stereoscopic 3D movie. It'll look even cuter with the red and blue glasses they have for those. But you sound like even more of a dunderhead now, because you know what? Octopus eyes rely on single photoreceptors. They don't even see color! And I know what you're thinking. I know you're about to say that some researchers have proposed a mechanism where octopuses could use chromatic aberration to still determine color information, but you know what? That's just a theory someone came up with! No one's ever been able to train octopuses to distinguish between colors in the lab, so don't you look like a big old clown right now. And lemme stop you before you try to come up with some more featherbrained nonsense, because it gets worse. Octopus eyes aren't even positioned for binocular vision! They may not even be that good at perceiving depth, seemingly relying on a combination of light polarization and bobbing their head. So it'll never work! You're never going to take an octopus to see Finding Nemo 2 in 3D! You just won't! Give up on it already!

i fucking love when halloween music is just surf rock with a ghoul laughing in the background

do you ever want to say some bullshit

People on here talk about Laura Palmer like she’s their friend who actually died