this is going to ruin the tour

must feel good as fuck to curse a prince for being rude to you while you were larping as an old woman for no reason

The ancient texts were true… They DO have a reaction image for everything…

(Funkmaster flex voice) New york city you listen to me. If you are pregnant with the antichrist right now its ok to give birth to it

Actually what is the expected lifespan of a stone wall? I grew up in New England

I don’t know. They could last indefinitely in perfect conditions on flat land. Like I said, they’re at the bottom of a mountain in Appalachia and this wall has held back 60 years of snow melt and ground shifting and it has survived countless major weather events. In my opinion it is very good work and I think 60 is a good run for a rock retaining wall. The problem is that grandpa feels like the wall was put up recently so he thinks it is shitty craftsmanship. He’s mad because he can’t quite grasp that this wall has done its job for 60 years. Dementia is a terrible disease but if you don’t laugh you’ll cry and grandpa’s righteous indignation at this man’s work is kinda hilarious.

obviously dietary requirements aren't a joke but my grandma sometimes runs errands for her church and i asked her what she's up to today and she said extremely seriously "ive got to track down the body of the gluten free christ, julia"