i stole this from twitter
To all my mutuals whether we talk much or not I love you all
sheepfilms
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🩵 avery cochrane 🩵
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let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
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PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
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oozey mess
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@broccolirambles
i stole this from twitter
To all my mutuals whether we talk much or not I love you all

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This is a reminder for those who handmake Christmas presents that now is not too early to start. It may in fact be a good time to start if you have a lot to make/your craft takes a long time. You should maybe start it now, whether that's brainstorming or actually doing the crafts!
Translating this into tumblr's preferred public service announcement format for this kind of alert:
Mel Brooks on taking studio notes:
in this terrifying world you continuously have the power to offer someone else a little relief . why would you withhold that. do you remember what a little relief feels like? it feels like a lot
excuse me? are you suggesting i frolic directly into someone's emotional space and assume what brings them relief, potentially causing more stress? are you encouraging people to reach past their own boundaries to help, increasing net suffering if it costs more than the other gains? surely not; that would be advocating for emotional self-harm.
this is a post about the woman who waived my late fee at the bank .
good for you, good for her, the wording on the initial post feels closer to blaming people who don't reach out than celebrating those who do by a large enough margin that i feel the need to hit back
you are a tar pit
I know I’ve reblogged this already today but I like. this point
"you are a tar pit" is instantly in my vocabulary. Excellent.

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was visiting a friend who has a farm, and one of the chickens has a home made flared cone on, so i asked what was up with that and she said "that's diesel, and she's suicidal" so obviously i went ??? and she pressed the door lock on her truck fob so the truck beeped, and this dumbass bird SPRINTED full tilt across the garden to shove her head in the tailpipe. she has to be locked up and coned so she doesn't gulp down toxic fumes direct from the pipe for some idiot bird reason. she is obsessed with doing this and has to be locked up any time someone is using a vehicle.
i told her i posted about this and she has an update (which i guess content warning for animal harm [the animal did it to it's damn fool self])
she found this out the first time when she auto-started her truck to warm it up before work one below-freezing morning and came out ~5 minutes later to find (the then unnamed) diesel with her head stuffed in the tail pipe hanging limply by her idiot neck and thought that she was dead, ran over and pulled her out, and the chicken went "oh hi! anyways mind if i get back in there?" and did it a-fucking-gain??
best guess is bc she feeds her chickens with a pvc gravity pipe like this
and despite having ~40 other chickens who don't fuck this up, diesel went "food comes from tubes, this is tube, ∴ this is the ~secret~ food hole that the others do not know about. i will be rewarded with golden seed for being the cleverest of them all :)" and is now on 24/7 vehicle related suicide watch. fine line between docile and dumb sometimes.
my artists rendition of the morning in question
Dear teen girls,
Stop abusing your boyfriends and yes what you are doing is abuse.
Stop:
Yelling at him in front of his friends
Hitting or slapping him when he does or says something you don’t like
Telling him he doesn’t have a choice when it comes to decisions that involve both of you
Telling him he can’t hang out with friends because you don’t like him
Telling him to not talk to other girls even if they are his friend
Forcing him to spend every moment with you
Belittling him and pointing out all his flaws
Calling him stupid or making fun of him for making a mistake
Threatening to break up with him if he doesn’t do what you want
Being emotionally manipulative and crying until he does what you want
Accusing him of cheating every time he’s not with you
Blow up is phone if he doesn’t text you every five minutes
Telling him you are the must thing that has ever happened to him and no one else will love
Physically attacking him when ever you are mad
Forcing him to have sex despite that fact that he said he didn’t want to
Invading his privacy by going through his phone
Getting mad at him for changing his password and demanding he tell you what it is
If a guy did any of these things to a girl it would be considered abuse but since its the other way around its considered normal. Throughout High school I saw many girl treating their boyfriends like shit. Sometime even physically abusing them in the hallways and no one trying to stop it because its a girl attacking a boy.
Boys: If your girlfriend does anything on this list leave her. It is abuse and you deserve better.
Girls: if you find your self doing anything on this list to your boyfriend you need to knock it off because you are being abusive.
!!!!!!!! My brother was abused by his babies mom and it started like this and escalated to child abuse and neglect.
You don’t deserve to be screamed at, ignored, or assaulted.
Not showing affection when she wants or not hugging her before class) or missing a phone call doesn’t warrant getting cussed out or hit.
Lol, I lost 5 followers from reblogging this. That’s fine, y'all can go
Whole lot of grown women do this too.
Just wanna throw these in too
Being passive aggressive with him when he wants to spend time with friends or doing other things
controlling when he’s able to go out with friends
Breaking up his friendships with other girls just because you’re insecure
Making him feel like his opinions in decisions that affect the both of you are irrelevant and don’t matter
SENDING HIS NUMBER TO STRANGERS TO TEST IF HE’S LOYAL OR NOT
testing him in anyway in general without his knowledge or permission (example: catfishing! it’s manipulative and weird don’t fucking do that)
taking money/credit cards without permission to spend on things without his knowledge ( had an ex friend do this constantly to her boyfriend and she’d always condone it because “he’ll get over it” )
guilting him for hanging out with friends/family over you and making him choose between you and friends/family
telling him “you don’t love me if you *insert harmless activity he wants to do here* “
being rude or mean to him in front of others to assert dominance or power over him
downloading apps to spy on his phone activity (yes, this is a thing “”regular”” people do) or snooping on his social media to see who he’s talking to
hitting him, slapping him, punching him, shoving him. literally how do people not understand slapping your male partner is bad. people tend to find this funny in media and society and its weird. KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF YOUR PARTNER WITHOUT PERMISSION.
I come from a family of very forward and manipulative women and i see it in media all the time. it’s fucked and people need to not be accepting of young girls acting like snot-nosed, abusive shit heads that think they can get away with manipulation and cruelty because they happen to be girls.
and let me add this. ABUSIVE TEEN GIRLFRIENDS TURN INTO ABUSIVE GROWN ASS WOMEN GIRLFRIENDS WHO TURN INTO ABUSIVE WIVES.
if you have an abusive teen or young adult gf right now fellas, leave. don’t let her use you to get her shit right. you’ll be so fucked up by the time she gets it together if she ever does and believe that most likely she won’t.
Can i just add that ive seen young queer girls do this to their girlfriends. Girls can be abusers and you are right to leave.
Women/young girls can definitely be just as abusive. I knew a young man that got ran over and had his leg broken by his girlfriend because (in her words he annoyed her) He refused to press charges. Another young lady started to hit her ex boyfriend because he wouldn’t take her back because of the abuse. He called the cops on her and they literally started laughing at him because she was very petite in comparison to him. Anyone can be abusive and I wish more people understood that.
dammit I’d spam my blog if i reblog this more than once but dude this is really important.
Oh my god. This is so important.
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
If you actually think that women can’t abuse men, you’re a threat to society and to yourself, and you need to be dealt with.
Everytime this gets a note when its nowhere near christmas I question my sanity just a little bit more
No, it is July, stop that, stop giving this notes, you guys have lost reblogging privileges
you would not believe this song has been here for quite so long and that tomorrow’s its date of birth
nine years in a waking dream and now with a comeback meme the parodies spring up from all round the earth
Happy birthday
Yes, there is a bouncy castle and a ball pit!
date of origin: 12th of july, 2014.
happy anniversary everyone

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you have won a lifetime supply of this
How do you feel?
good!
I CAN SELL THIS AND GET RICH
im drowning in my supply help
Eh it's okay
BAD. VERY BAD
results/other
you would receive the supply once a month
the brand/type will vary so you could
you can sell the things you get/give them away but they will keep coming until you die
So my parents are on vacation for a couple of weeks, which means that I am going up (literally up, they live just up the hill like a block from us) once a day to look after their cats.
They have 2 cats. Both very raggedy and now elderly former feral boys, both gingers. There is not a single braincell between the pair of them.
Wash (full government name Washburn) thinks all humans are friend shaped. Sherpa (Full name Stop Climbing That Get Down From There What Are You A Sherpa) is terrified of every human on the planet except my parents.
So, whenever I go up and let myself in, I hear the scrabble of claws on the hardwood floor. Wash then runs full speed into my shins demanding attention, and Sherpa ramps off the whatever he was perched on, a wall, another wall, and scrambles up the stairs to hide under the bed upstairs. Note that he has seen me regularly for 9 years now.
My mom texted me the other day to ask 'Did u see both of them'
Me; 'Wash is clinging to my pants and refusing to let me leave and Sherpa was on top of the fridge again somehow. He's upstairs hiding now.'
Mom; 'that cat is 14 years old HOW IS HE STILL CLIMBING THE FRIDGE HE KNOWS HE IS NOT ALLOWED UP THERE. ANARCHY AS SOON AS WE LEAVE UGH'
My mom texted me
the other day to ask ‘Did
u see both of them’
Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.
You really don’t get the same experience on other websites huh
∧,,,∧ ( ・ω・) mmmm, vegan soup! ( つ旦O と_)_)
∧,,,∧ ( ・◎・) slrrrp ( ゙ノ ヾ と_)_)
∧,,,∧ ( ・ω・) Hmm, tastes like prion disease… ( つ旦O と_)_)
∧,,,∧ ( ・ω・) ( つ O. __ と_)_) (__()、;.o:。 ゚*・:.。 _ _ ξ (´ `ヽ、 __ ⊂,_と( )⊃ (__()、;.o:。 V V ゚*・:.。
Dude wtf
This is the "I dug up human bones" website and you're actually surprised?
Breast milk ice cream was far less creepy, not really creepy at all, but not shocked at all here.
Don't forget the vaginal yeast bread.
I think it would be very cool to be able to breathe underwater. Expressly for the purpose of sitting on the seafloor and closing your eyes and blocking out noise except for the water. So peaceful. I think that would fix me
Thousands of notes later and this is still the funniest reply I have gotten

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Honor-killing, infanticide, slavery, and witch hunts were only ended because they were against Christianity.
Some religions are better than others.
They were called the Southern Baptists because, virtually alone among Evangelicals, they weren’t abolitionists (they were too concerned, humanistically, with the secular interests of their region). The abolition movement in the Protestant world was almost exactly coterminous with the Second Great Awakening. Abolition also resulted from a Catholic revival, in their part of Western Christendom.
Also slavery was abolished twice in Western Christianity. The other time was in the 0640s AD, in a series of church councils: it was automatic excommunication for a Catholic to own or traffic slaves from then until now, except for a suspension from 1436 to 1551. Slavery came back along with a bunch of other pagan Greco-Roman bullshit in the leadup to the Renaissance—because humanism prioritizes the assumptions and preferences of the violent selfish ape it’s named after. (Spanish colonies became dependent on slave labor during that suspension of the excommunication, so they made it illegal to publish anything written by the Pope without the governor’s permission. See, sometimes he mentioned Catholics were forbidden to be involved in slavery.)
As for witch hunts…no, Christians did not begin witch hunts. They’re as old as humanity. The only pagan Roman emperor who didn’t execute any accused witches was Alexander Severus. China and Japan’s last executions for witchcraft were in the 1880s, the last ones in Korea were in the 1890s. In 1990, a South African Catholic, Benedict Daswa, was murdered by his animist neighbors for refusing to pitch in to pay the local witchfinder. Last time that I know of that a traditional Navajo murdered someone they thought was trying to witch them and got caught, was 1993.
In 0785 AD, at the Council of Paderborn, the Catholic Church declared it heresy to believe in witchcraft and imposed capital punishment for anyone who harmed an accused witch. The council was mostly just a series of condemnations of pagan practices that newly converted Saxons were continuing—one of which practices being witch hunts—because the council was convened during Charlemagne’s conquest of Saxony. That’s why the Early Modern witch hunts (belief in witches being another piece of pagan bullshit brought back by humanism) were almost all in Protestant territory. In Catholic ones, the Inquisition executed witch hunters.
You need to actually know details about history before expressing opinions about it.
The human side of any religion can harbour its bad apples and terrible ideas.
What matters is what the religion as a whole has done about it.
Yes Christianity has had some rotten apples and been involved in some deeply disgusting business.
But is that stuff condoned today? Are we making excuses for why it was actually 'good'?
Not in the least. In fact many things have been completely outlawed over the centuries. And that's great to know.
More recent horrors like sexual abuse by priests and the infamous 'Magdalene Laundries' are out in the light, and whilst work no doubt is still to be done, there's no hiding or excusing possible any more.
Which is as it should be.
Cannot stand the trend of censoring any and all words that describe concepts that might make you go :( especially when the censoring is done in that quarter-assed way that's just 'did a lil scribble over a vowel so you know that I know this word describes a no-no."
I'm not even going to be vague about what sparked this. Do not fucking censor the word 'stole.' I'm at my fucking limit.