60 guys only manage to stab the 1 guy 23 times: I can't fucking breathe I'm laughing too hard, you suck at this

It's so fucking baffling to me that hospitals went back to not masking. Like good news, we have lots of empirical evidence that masking prevents infections! Now to go back to walking around this absolute petri dish of a building filled with extremely vulnerable people unmasked

here’s your sign to do something spontaneous

*combusts*

that’s one way to do it

@bovineblogger

hey y’all do you want to see a dragon that i drew

my corner store guy is a 50 year old man who's my best friend in the world and recently he was like "you're too pretty to be single I have some nephews you should meet. very handsome!" and I was like "a niece might be more up my alley" and he just got more excited and said "ah even better! I was overselling my nephews but my nieces are very beautiful"

*in a rap battle* i wonder who your mother could have been if she never had you

I never thought I would live to see a "your mom" joke that doesn't degrade their mom.