Utter Trash For Outer Space

kids these days don't know what it felt like to be bisexual and wear a stupid as fuck hawaiian shirt in 2017

I gently cradle my mug in both hands, holding it closely as i gently lift it to my mouth and sip carefully, as if savoring the taste. When you look in the mug you see i’m just drinking water.

I love insults like landlubber and cityslicker, look at this idiot not used to areas and situations

girl, the pollen

Pangaea was wasted on the dinosaurs. Imagine the railway network.

I would still use my turn signals in the Mad Max Wasteland. They'd call me "Signal" because I'd hit my blinker before ramming the enemy hot rods into the side of a desert ravine. I'd use my turn signal every time. They would respect me for this.

I hate the “open floor plan” that everyone is obsessed with in houses now. I want nooks and crannies and bizarre floor plans. I don’t need to be able to see what someone is doing on the other side of the house. I want places to hide and lurk and dwell in the shadows. I am the beast who awaits in the labyrinth

STOP no more live-action remakes. We're going the other way now. Animated Casablanca. Animated The Godfather. Animated Oppenheimer. Animated Fight Club.

love the word “rapscallion”. like not only are you a rascal but you’re also kind of spring onion about it too

cemeteries aren’t creepy they’re actually devoted to memory and rest and love and humanity

the bear is like if a baseball movie was a tv show. and if the small town underdog team was a beef restaurant and the mean big shot team from the big city is grief. and the small town is chicago. if this post doesn’t make sense that’s on you not me

I don't want to cite my references. I want a puppet rat to pop up from the bottom of the screen holding a sign saying "It's True!"