emotionally hairless

Imagine my shock as a neurodivergent teen when I first realized that using large vocabulary and eloquent speech doesn't make you less likely to be misinterpreted, rather it adds an entirely new layer of misinterpretation I had never even realized existed in the form of people thinking you're being snobbish or condescending when you're just trying to be specific

I'm about to wii sports resort to violence

I'm about to have a wii fit

What do you mean killing isn't an act of devotion

they call it committing murder because it's a commitment. it's a more serious commitment than marriage

my love language is touch but i have a heavy accent

that’s kamala harris

Anyway here is your reminder that poor effeminate men existed in the 18th century and any reading of class that acts as tho every poor man was a hyper masculine rugged labourer and every rich man was a effeminate fop is an inherently flawed reading of class 🙃

In the most ‘Greek theatre’ of ways, this is a tragedy. Tragedies are meant to teach onlookers: “See how these rich idiots, despite their riches, cannot escape the consequences of their actions, their hubris, and their defiance of the laws of common sense and decency? See their awful demise? Don’t be like them.”

someone stole the fucking youtube to mp3 converter off my car

who else up garging they goyle

every cylindrical object should have flaccid and erect states simply because it would be funny

awkwardly sucking dr. pepper out of a flaccid can

ELEGANTLY and SENSITIVELY sucking dr pepper out of a flacid can. Girls!! Hmu

if you drop out of art school and become a lawyer you get Phoenix ace attorney but if you drop out of law school and become an artist you have Spencer iCarly

humans don’t have enough ornamentation. where’s the plumage, the antlers

i could go for a good vibrant throat sac i could display as i sing in the mating season

Humans have some of the most extreme hair variation over their bodies in the animal kingdom, with hair on some parts of our body a few millimetres long and fine enough to be almost invisible, and hair in other parts a good metre long if not artificially trimmed. Part of the inside of our mouths are turned out to make our lips bright red, we have comically oversized breasts and lack penis bones to make erections more indicative of impressive circulation, and have some of the most complex behavioural adaptations to self-ornamentation for courtship seen in anything that doesn’t spend half its life collecting blue bottle caps. How much ornamentation do you want?

I’d like antlers, as previously stated

I want bioluminescence