maximum effort

The Rihanna-  Fuck’s up your ex’s car in broad daylight and waits for him to come out so he knows it was her

The Nicki Minaj- Dresses you up in her clothes with your titties and ass all out. Records videos of you in the club dancing up on some dude, posts them to instagram and tags your ex in all of them

The Beyoncé- Tells you to forget him and not worry about him. Then, coincidentally a week later his car gets repossessed, he loses his job, leg gets broken in three different places and he’s living back with his mama and can’t qualify for unemployment

The Naomi Campbell- Hooks you up with her man’s wealthy friend. Is always sure to let your ex know what your new man has bought you

The Viola Davis- Has a sit down with your ex and gives him a lecture of how disgusting of a person he is and she doesn’t let him get a word in. Tells him he owes you an apology and after that to never speak to you again or she will have more than words ready for him next time. Ends conversation with “are we clear?”

The Cardi B- Literally will kill him

The Lil Kim- Gets her brother and his friends to jump him

The Tiffany ‘New York’ Pollard- Shows up to his job,cusses him out and gets him fired. Will wait for him out in the parking lot to cuss him out some more

Joe Biden has a message for fraternity guys

it’s also why there was a revival of the unattributed and at the time probably rather out of fashion mucedorus at the globe in 1610 (the same year as the winter’s tale), and why ben jonson wrote a chariot pulled by bears into his court masque oberon, performed on new year’s day of 1611.

we think the answer is polar bears.

no, seriously!  in late 1609 the explorer jonas poole captured two polar bear cubs in greenland and brought them home to england, where they were purchased by the beargarden, the go-to place in elizabethan london for bear-baiting and other ‘animal sports.’  it was at the time run by edward alleyn (yes, the actor) and his father-in-law philip henslowe (him of the admiral’s men and that diary we are all so very grateful for), and would have been very close, if not next to, the globe theatre.

of course, polar bear cubs are too little and adorable for baiting, even to the bloodthirsty tudor audience, aren’t they?  so, what to do with the little bundles of fur until they’re too big to be harmless?  well, if there’s anything we know about the playwrights and theatre professionals of the time, it’s that they knew how to make money and draw in audiences.  and the spectacle of a too-small-to-be-dangerous-yet-but-still-real-live-and-totally-WHITE-bear?  what good entertainment businessman is going to turn down that opportunity? 

By taking income into account, it allows the impoverished able to still survive while paying any fines they may incur. And, ultimately, while $100,000 dollars would be noticeable to a millionaire, they would still get by. And, assuming the law is properly implemented, they would be paying the same equivalent of their yearly income that a poorer person would. That’s what makes it fair. They would be impacted the same way - but you are looking at the amount rather than the equation.

Person making 10 dollars an hour: “Fuck, I better slow down”

Millionaire driving a Jaguar: “LOL 400 DOLLARS, FUCK THAT, NYOOM”

Compared to a proportional ticket.

Person making 10 dollars an hour and must pay 400 dollar ticket: “Fuck, I better slow down.”

See, he was in kindergarten when Sesame Street first aired, and he saw the first episode, live, with his classmates. He described the experience of seeing this for the first time as incredible. The entire class loved it.

The next day, however, the teacher announced that they could no longer show it, due to some people upset that it showed interracial friendships, of kids of different ethnicities playing together. Keep in mind that this show was only two years after laws banning interracial marriages were overturned.