sorry, im a scorpio

Pronounce Saxophone like Persephone, I dare you

This is the way you’re supposed to do pranks!

I try SO hard not to make faces when I hear someone around me say wild shit but I just can’t stop myself

July is about internal peace

This was the worst month of my life

Please use keep reporting them for code violations! Based on these photos, as a disabled person I wouldn’t be able to get around this area because they are blocking the sidewalk. I am wondering if there might be a way to report them under the ADA too.

[ID: a photograph of a poorly constructed wall made of cinderblock, expanding foam, and a single piece of wood in front of a police precinct. It is at least few feet high and shaped like an L, restricting access to the building on one side, and extends past the sidewalk, into the street.]

i just saw a post of ‘crunchy plant inspired baby names’ and i wanted to share it with you for character names but then tumblr mobile glitched and. and i lost it. im so sorry. i have let you all down

thank you kind soul, now you can all make your characters crunchy. like god intended

YOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

This is the forbidden reboot couple we deserved

Honestly love this

I am a simple woman. I enter the kitchen. I eat four servings of bread products. I leave.

It’s one serving if you serve all of it to yourself at once.

I like the way you think, friend.

What I love about this is its acknowledgment that Jason had no intentions at all

this is all 100% true but it always made me really mad that Chidi’s “crime” was having a severe anxiety disorder like he needed understanding and therapy, sending him to the Bad Place for something he had literally no control over was incredibly fucked up

Why do women hate innovation?

some of these are smart, but one of them is a bathtub lobster, which is kinda hard to overlook

i love an irish accent though and how they’re just like fuck these letters i’m not saying them

*SNIFF SNIFF*

What gets me is that after the dog realized they were kinda scared, he/she lied down so the cows could be in control and feel safer. Such love. Animals are amazing.