the rearview only blinds you

French people when you call it bukake and not "nut a la visage" and shibari instead of "corde attacher l'submissive"

you have to forgive the printer because it's one of the most machine-ass machines we interact with on a day to day basis. that thing says kerchunk. hardly anything says kerchunk these days. you can't get mad at her when she kerchunks up a little.

Crazy that tech has gotten so bad that we're doing printer forgiveness now

#lmao see my takeaway is that we should try to convince everybody#who tries to like awkwardly stick the bdsm stoplight system into ancient history and outerspace etc#to consider copying off how the pro wrestling circuit handles things--tags via whetstonefires

was talking about my thesis with my aunt and i was explaining to her that because i'm doing an mfa in creative writing my thesis is writing a novel and i'm supposed to have a first draft by the end of the summer. and she said "wow! and i mean i'm sure that's fun for you?" and when i said yes it is she said "that's great. because if it were me i'd kill myself." which was a slightly nuts thing to say in a church waiting for my grandmother's funeral to start but i respect her honesty

Do you ever start bullshitting a paper, and then look over it halfway through and think, ’…Wait a minute, I could be onto something here.’

this is the definition of college.

Literally I was writing a paper on Asian salt water crocodiles, like a simple about them paper for a college class, and I started noticing some inconsistencies in the scientific papers I was sourcing and I accidentally discovered that the crocodile has been misdiagnosed as least concerned on the endangered species list when they should be classified as endangered and now my professor is having me write a formal report to the international Red List to have them reclassified and all I wanted to do was write this paper on an animal I thought was cool and now I’m considered an expert on this species…

this is how it works half of esteemed biologists trip and fall into their specialty while pursuing something else. one lecturer i just went to started as a biochemist researching antibiotics and discovered that crocodiles change colors based on environment and now he has 30+ crocs in his yard for research purposes and he’s just like… “wait… i’m a chemist…”

How did so many people end up with crocodiles on accident?????

you just go into science and after a while, crocodile…

Reblogging this for the third time in celebration of African World Heritage Day ✨🌍🪘

@landsharkrawr

Sometimes you send something you found online to a friend because you want to brighten their day, and sometimes you send something you found online to a friend with the precise attitude and bearing of a cat very carefully lining up their paw with the back of another cat's head.