Buzzfeed Unsolved “The Demonic Goatman’s Bridge”
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@arise-ascend
Buzzfeed Unsolved “The Demonic Goatman’s Bridge”

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they've been arguing about malgendering on twitter so here's the truth from me, the arbiter of truth (jk but ive been talking about malgendering long before it became a popular buzzword and heres my understanding of it)
malgendering is a form of transphobia wherein a transphobic person uses their victim's correct gender to harass or demean them. it is meant to be the inverse of misgendering, where a transphobe uses the victim's incorrect gender to harass or demean them.
misgendering towards trans women can be as simple as "youre a man." but malgendering is more insidious, like someone saying "you really are a girl" when she makes a mistake in order to insult her intelligence. the phrase "you really are a girl" is positive when removed from the context of the trans woman making a mistake and the transphobe's sarcastic tone that implies shes stupid in an misogynistic way.
if a trans man does something like standing up for himself against an unfair situation or asks for better accommodations/treatment, and a transphobe wants to use that to imply he is selfish and entitled, they might say "trans men really are men" which again, is a true statement on its own. but in the context of the situation, its clear the transphobe is using the stereotypical worst qualities of men to insult and undermine someone's very identity.
malgendering can be any severity of harm, just like misgendering. my mom slipping up in the first months of my transition and accidentally calling me "she", and a bigot shouting "YOURE A WOMAN YOULL NEVER BE A MAN" at me are both examples of misgendering, but one is much worse than the other and its the same with malgendering. being told "trans men are the men of the trans community" as an insult is annoying and rude but not a big deal. however, right now ICE is torturing trans men in concentration camps by forcing them to do pointless and grueling labor. and when they become exhausted, theyre told "I thought you were a man. if youre really a man this should be easy for you" these are both examples of malgendering. one is a microaggression, the other is literal torture.
malgendering happens equally to both trans men and trans women, its not something that is unique to anyone because it is a form of transphobia. the strategy is that if a transphobe tries to make a trans persons life as their true gender so miserable and unsafe, detransitioning seems like the safer and happier option. its psychological torment, moreso than the plain and obvious insult of intentional misgendering. so dont let it happen, call it out when you see it and dont be fooled by transphobes trying to erase the context and be like "what!! what i said was true!"
I don't understand how cis people obsessed with gender norms think trans people are the weird ones. they're going around believing that your name has to correlate to your genitals. your fashion has to correlate to your genitals. your behaviours have to correlate to your genitals. your hobbies have to correlate to your genitals. who you date has to correlate to your genitals. whether you can put sparkles on your eyelids or not has to correlate to your genitals. and then people like me go "hmm. I might not do that. maybe I'll just do what feels fun and okay instead" and they LOSE their MINDS
queer people who have done zero self reflection when they see someone who doesn't look fem in their space
ACTUALLY FUCKING THO
#the bioessentialism is gross and inescapable#‘oh i’m just not comfortable around this person bc i don’t know them!’#is that it? or is it that they’re masculine presenting and you only think of non-binary people as girl lite
Shoutout to weird girls who became weird boys and weird boys who became weird girls and weird girls and boys who became both or neither. Let's all be weird and strange together
@this-is-trans-joy

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before my egg cracked, i had noticed that trans people were often pro-accessibility and up-to-date on the needs of disabled people, but i hadn’t seen any inherent connection between the two (other than the obvious minority-looking-out-for-other-minority thing). but now that i’m trans and medically transitioning, and i have to constantly repeat myself while talking to doctors and nurses, and explain things about my own anatomy to medical staff who should already know this, and having every single problem i might have blamed on my “condition” so nothing i say is taken seriously, all of the sudden i have a little sneak peak into the life of someone who has to deal with this all the time. like shit bro, being disabled probably sucks ass, someone should do something about this
happy disability pride month, we all deserve autonomy and respect and access to medication
since it's pride month i think now's a good time to put an end to the discourse: transmisogyny and transandrophobia are equal and non-opposing forces which can be experienced by nearly anybody if they're just in the wrong place at the wrong time. no one group of trans people has it worse than the other, because everyone's personal experiences are simply too complex and wide-ranging to ever accurately answer that question, nor is it a question worth answering in the first place because it could only serve to drive a wedge in our community when we need solidarity and unity now more than ever. love your transfem sisters, love your transmasc brothers, love your nonbinary and intersex siblings, and do it more than you hate bigots. happy pride
I was thinking of a pride art challenge people could do with their OCs, because I thought it'd be cute! A queer/trans artist with their creations.
but then I realised that same challenge would be infinitely more funny with folks who have atypical or horror OCs
it makes me so sad seeing people in my life who tell me they think they might be trans but they’re too scared to confront that reality because the transgender experience just seems to be filled with terror and misery. trans people please never stop talking about the joys of being transgender. please never stop talking about your excitement and joy and happiness. maybe you think that the trans experience is all doom and gloom, too. I promise it’s not. focus on the joy and you will feel better I promise.

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transgender
you can be that if you want to. and that's kind of nice
today I am looking outside and I see long silvery spiderweb strands catching the sunlight and the air is crisp and cool on my skin and the sun is glowing through the grass and I am exactly who I want to be. and I chose this. and that's kind of nice
doing research into my penis options and this is such a funny stock image to use here
its so weird to me that cis people will dislike their name so ardently and yet. not change it. you guys know that’s an option, right. no one can make you keep the shit name your mom gave you. no, not even her.
One of my friends in undergrad changed his name because he didn’t want to bear the name of his abusive and absent father. It’s been years since he did it, and he still says that it was the single best decision of his life.
One of my friends in high school changed his named as soon as he turned 18, so that the ethnic name his family gave him was finally the name reflected on all of his paperwork. He told me that he understood why his parents had given him an “English” name, but that he felt that if he needed to assimilate in order to succeed, then that was a type of success that he didn’t want.
When I was on my way home from the courthouse after changing my own name, I got into a conversation with my rideshare driver, who was extremely interested once I told him what I was in court for, and wanted to know how I’d done it, how much it cost, was it difficult, etc. It turned out that his girlfriend had chosen the name “Yo-yo” when she came to the United States, unaware of how rare that was as a name, and that she was frequently made fun of because of it. Neither one of them had realized that a name change was so easy, and he told me he was excited to let her know that she had options.
There was an intern at a summer job I had once, who changed her name to be the same name, but a different spelling. She said that she had no idea why her parents had spelled her name so oddly to begin with, and suspected that it was just an honest mistake either by them or by some nurse, but it had been a headache for her entire life, and it was a huge relief to not need to be correcting people’s spelling on important documents anymore.
One of my exes legally changed his name to have an exclamation point, because he liked to sign his name with an exclamation point.
You can always change your name if you don’t like it. You always have that option. It doesn’t matter why – it can be conformist or anti-assimilationist, serious or silly, a minor change or a major change. Your name is yours, and you have every right to change it to be whatever you want.
Pornography remains an important part of queer expression! Queer people deserve space to explore/express their sexuality. Rejecting the expression of sexuality because some people do it in an exploitative way or get addicted would be like closing the Stonewall Inn because they were run by the mafia at one point or because they sell beer which can be addictive. Sexuality is an important part of the queer community and stopping queer people from expressing that is a form of oppression. Queer people deserve to enjoy their sexuality without shame!
Porn can and does exist ethically. I am so grateful to know queer sex workers, and I love not only them but also their work. I'm not ashamed of the ways queer porn has been a part of my development. I am so grateful for works from Elana Dykewomon which includes explicit sex or erotica from authors like Kathryn Moon who express sexuality in a beautiful and emotionally powerful way. Shutting down human sexuality is not something I am interested in engaging in.
This is a man loving blog btw. I know this is the man hating site and increasingly the trans man hating site but that shit stops at my borders
And again since terfs and radfems are crying about it

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the thing with transphobia directed at nonbinary people is that like. it is ultimately rooted in misogyny. people will see nonbinary as "woman lite" or "embarrassing man who needs to be shamed back into masculinity" and any interaction where they make fun of nonbinary people is basically tinted by that. insults leveraged at nonbinary people are often about how incompetent they are, not knowing their place, being too sensitive/tender, being delusional about the way the world works. which are misogynistic points. but anyway.
saw a radfem post about how there's no female version of emasculation. bestie yes there is
"masculinity is empowering and dominant and femininity is degrading and restrictive. there's no humiliating way of being stripped of chains" i want you to look women of color & disabled women in the eyes and tell them this. that there is no humiliating way to be stripped of your womanhood.
people are reblogging this again so I wanna add that on top of women of color and disabled women you can also just talk to trans men&mascs and nonbinary and intersex people raised female about this.
it's very funny to me whenever people who insist they are the final voice for Trve Feminism and have such an accurate understanding of misogyny, also completely ignore how much the cover-up of the violent policing of failed womanhood plays a role in patriarchy. babe stop believing everything the patriarchy says!!!!! IT IS LYING TO US CONSTANTLY!!!!!!!!