oh well i guess ill just be fat and hot

"your life is yours to mold" oh nooooooooo oh no oh my god. oh fuck me. no. oh my god. oh im so fucked dude.

Getting up for the bathroom and coming back to a new seat every 30 minutes

going over to my minimalist girlfriend’s house and she apologizes profusely for the mess and there’s just a single perfect, fresh pea on the floor of her living room

Blue Lois

can i help you

Red Marge

jesus christ. I Am Under Fucking Attack

World Heritage Post

i deserve a medal for this post. not because i was particularly funny but because i survived an onslaught of nearly one hundred gimmick blogs in the wake of this post popping off, and the fact that i didn’t try to track any of them down and snuff them out with my bare hands is a testament to my immeasurable strength and should be rewarded. at one point i had “the official letter h” add on to this post. you wanna know that blog’s gimmick? the really funny and original and worthwhile gimmick the official letter h blog had? yep you guessed it they just gave me the god damned letter H and then fucked off. only jesus knows the suffering i endured over that harsh winter, and he wept for me

keep getting glimpses into an alternate timeline where plurality is more normalized and you can buy shitty tshirts and mugs about it

When cats put their whole body into making a sound. Only to be squeak.

why the fuck is it called the xbox 360 what does 360 mean???????????????????

when u see it u turn 360 degrees and walk away

turning 360 degrees would face you right back to the xbox you dipshit

this post somehow still in circulation despite everyone involved being deactivated

even you

Even me

Shout out to all the Project Hail Mary fanartists who are very aware that Rocky weighs 370lbs and cannot live in our atmosphere and then completely ignore those facts to draw Rocky hugging/snuggling Grace and sleeping on his chest no problem you're doing the Lord's work