The Length of 2 Baseballs and 3 times as Dense

Have you tried turning it off and then on again?

Is it plugged in properly?

What does the manual say?

You can probably Google that

Have you eaten?

I know you remember making the food but did you actually eat it?

Well do it sitting down then

You're probably having a reaction to one of the ingredients, read the label and see if there's anything in there that you recognise

Okay did you actually tell him that? With your mouth? Using words?

The painkillers only work if you take them

Cool had has self-flagellating actually made this work before or?

Yeah okay you 'must remember to' but you remember to NOW so do it NOW

Put it in your fucking calendar

Do you want me to show you how to set up reminders

So use BOTH hands then

Which is to say,

You are expected to "relate" to some characters and stories. Yes. That is not the same thing I keep witnessing, where people will decide a given character is literally everything they are the very instant they have anything in common, or an antagonist is exactly like a real person who hurt them, and emotionally invest SO much into this that they can feel actually betrayed when the events deviate from exactly the catharsis they hoped for.

This seems so normalized by some people, I suspect they assume by default that this is basically what fiction is "for" and it never even crossed their minds that you're supposed to enjoy most stories as an outside observer rather than as some sort of guided roleplay session.

This is why creators get harassed and abused more than ever by entitled fandoms.

Remembering the spectacular failure and public humiliation of a crook 54 years ago! I recommend celebrating with a relevant episode of Behind the Bastards

“I’m probably not saying that correctly”/“sorry for my pronunciation” = 👍 understandable! foreign languages often have sounds that aren’t used in English and learning to correctly pronounce unfamiliar phonemes is genuinely difficult even with help

“lol I’m not even gonna TRY to pronounce that 😂” = 👎 THIS is the problem, if treats languages other than English like they are inherently ‘weird’ or ‘overly complicated’ just because you aren’t familiar with them

This tumblr sexyman is your son!

façade is a freeware game (which you can still download and play) that rose to internet fame around 2011-early 2012. it was an (imo) interesting concept where you played as a friend of a married couple visiting for the first time in years, using interactive text and game AI to either solve or help collapse their failing marriage. the graphics are extremely simple. the music is weird. the voice acting is pretty good.

it got to memetic quality pretty fast because of the….customizable nature of what you could say to them as well as the fact that trip (the husband) would forcibly remove you from the apartment and cause a game over if you said too many wrong things.

a big part of the meme was that if you said “melon” or “melons,” you’d almost always automatically be kicked out. this was bc the game always caught it as slang for tits regardless of context.

this shit feels like it was yesterday but it was almost an entire decade ago and im upset

Game sold badly? Fired

Game sold well? Fired

Game just came out? Fired

Game not out yet? Fired

Game literally just announced? Fired

[Source]

Part of socializing and having friends is being a good listener even when you don't actually give a shit about the subject.

Your are hurting other people's feelings when you bluntly respond with "Anyway..." and then change the topic.

It can not always be about your preferred topic.

Autistic mom of two autistic kiddos here. I do something with my kids called playing the good friend game. I have them ask me a question like “what did you do this weekend” and then I respond with something they don’t like ie: “I ate some sushi for dinner on Saturday! It was delicious!” Their job is to not make a gross face and not to yuck my yum. They have to ask me a follow up question! Minimum one about what I liked about the sushi or who I went with or what I ordered etc. and they have to be kind. I change up what I answer with for the initial question and for all follow ups. It’s incredible!

You can learn how to chit chat about things because you care about the people around you. Small talk is banal and boring but the people in your life are real and lovely and nuanced. Get to know them. You can do it. You’ll build relationships that last. Don’t do it for the sake of small talk. Do it because you’re deeply invested in learning how to see the people around you as whole pictures.