America’s Sweetbreads

i hate to admit this but i think if i were in a bad mood and spongebob were around i wouldnt be able to navigate that situation with the patience or grace it demands. and i worry he would blame himself

imagine a world where humans have stronger bones and so car crashes evolve to be more brutal

Need a man to impregnate

If I was in a fanfiction and started coughing up flowers while working at a flower shop (because this is a flower shop au) I would NOT connect my crush on the tattoo artist next door to the flower cough situation. I would freak the fuck out and think the pollen at work was doing some Last of Us shit to me, quit my job and move FAR away. inadvertently my flame for the tattoo artist would fade with distance, solving my hanahaki situation and proving my 'the flowers were trying to turn me into a plant zombie' theory

all of life can be approached from a perspective of hop drink usage, but its a bit hard because it actually works like a horses shoe

this could literally not be a more random set of words and images

looks like someone’s had either too little or too much hopdrink

I have long beautiful legs because I was an elegant wading bird in a past life

the loss of the audio jack is due to puritan culture hating on penetration

the woeful jiangshi... the humble chicken... united by their hopping movement and intensity of response to scattered rice, it can be difficult at times to tell these commonly encountered birds apart

the fortune teller just drew the ten of pregnant werewolves card, which could mean nothing,

it should go without saying, but a hooligan is a marsupial, a miscreant is a mustelid, and a ne'er-do-well is an herb in the mint family

most cringe part of public school was that time in 4th grade they made us melt down millions of dollars worth of gold and use it to construct various animal-headed idols which we then had to kneel before for 30 minutes everyday :\