Andrew Minyard Defense Squad

Andrew: can but hates it. Makes him feel desperate. Also the man of his dreams registered none of it and literally only responded to Andrew being a weirdo so clearly it's all a scam.

Dan: yes, but can't see it as more than an act for when you want to get into someone's pants. Makes life hell for Matt before they start dating. Makes life *very fun* once they do.

Allison: absolutely. Does not respect any man who falls for it.

Matt: learned from watching guys try to flirt with his mom and her boxing friends, so his tactics are somewhat...demographically skewed. Eats shit when trying to romance Dan.

Aaron: Contrary to what second-hand accounts may tell us, this man is oozing charisma. Med student jock who goes to therapy, it's the whole package. If he were nine inches taller he would be the main character.

Nicky: bagged a man with high school-level grasp of his language. Raised two teens on a bartender salary. The results speak for themselves.

Kevin: nope. This man is fake as hell, star factor is doing alllllll the heavy lifting here. Unless you're as obsessed with exy as he is, in which case you're liable to confuse his attention *on* you with attention *to* you. Many have fallen victim to this effect. There is no support group.

Seth: chernobyl-level "you could fix me" aura

Renee: you're not sure if she's flirting or just being nice. Your friends are no help. Her friends seem to have a monetary incentive in the answer and can't be trusted. Your best shot might literally be praying for mercy.

idk i guess i just forgot that from an outsiders POV, of course andrew is going to be mildly unsettling. & that him talking so much in neil’s POV was a rarity.