Nothing really matters ...

And I don't disagree that Crowley was a good angel, but...the ONLY ONE who wanted to make better art?

What about Muriel reading their detective novels over cuppertea? Gabriel making the karaoke machine play the same song everyday just because Beelzebub liked it. The metatron claiming to enjoy food in his time. TO SAY NOTHING ABOUT AZIRAPHALE HIMSELF, who was constantly questioning and enjoying and wanting to improve the world, but apparently that's all just Crowley's influence, all so God can watch them like a dating show?

Every time they actually give Earth a real chance, angels and demons both fall in love with it, and prove that they can change their behavior for the better. But no, Crowley is the only one who ever cared or mattered or had any potential, apparently. Instead of just..stopping angels and demons from abusing their power against humans...their entire identities are taken away to make them conform. It's like the opposite of the good place.

... Meaning, I'm pretty sure Neil Gaiman did it ON PURPOSE, knowing how much it would upset the fans.

Neil knew how badly we wanted Aziraphale and Crowley (OUR version of Aziraphale and Crowley---the specific version of them we met in Season 1) to be together. He knew we wanted to see them resolve their issues and ultimately choose to be with each other in the end.

Instead, Aziraphale and Crowley forgo that emotional journey in favor of unnecessary pain. Neither of them experience real character growth in the finale; they are shown to be the worst and unhappiest versions of themselves, without getting a real shot at redemption. They never fix their communication issues. They don't express their true, authentic feelings for one another (don't @ me with that bullshit hand kiss thing). They never manage to get on the same page emotionally---even when they both agree to commit suicide (which I'm pretty sure was not the "one thing" Aziraphale wanted).

"Why give me Crowley? Why make me complete and then take it away?"

EMOTIONAL WITHHOLDING is a common abuse tactic utilized by men like Neil. They enjoy creating ATTACHMENT in their victims and then "TAKING IT AWAY".

It's easy to see how much Neil enjoyed frustrating his fans in retrospect. He actively taunted us on social media with the catchphrase "WAIT AND SEE" and threatened to make Aziraphale and Crowley kiss---but in a way we "wouldn't like". He loved dangling the implied promise of a happy ending over our heads, which we now know he never planned to deliver on.

Neil was unkind to his audience. He was also unkind to his characters. Aziraphale and Crowley are treated as punching bags throughout the entire series---shown to be "messy" for the sake of entertainment, but not as a real obstacle for either of them to overcome. God herself says she enjoys seeing how much Aziraphale values his relationship with Crowley. And this turns out to be her justification for "taking it away". (Tell me THAT isn't some fucked up shit.) Aziraphale and Crowley experience real emotional pain as the result of her actions---and this is demonstrated by the incredible acting skills of Michael Sheen and David Tennant.

Neil explicitly sold this as "a love story" when he created the show. Based on the tone of the book, an eventual union between Aziraphale and Crowley would have made the most narrative sense. It would have emphasized the overarching themes of love, agency, and the futility of "choosing sides". But that would have required Neil to possess the same ethos as Terry Pratchett---meaning LOVE AND RESPECT FOR FELLOW HUMAN BEINGS.

We were never going to get a good love story out of Neil. Men like Neil get off on "PUNISHING" people for no apparent reason; he obviously did this with our beloved characters, to disastrous result. Nonetheless, we still manage to ascribe deeper meaning to Aziraphale and Crowley, thanks to the phenomenal acting team and the dedication of this fandom. Aziraphale and Crowley remain the greatest love story of all time, not because of anything Neil actually wrote, but because of everything that was projected onto them by the people who cared. We assigned their relationship a depth "Neil himself" never could have imagined---one that exemplifies our maximalist ideals of love and the decision to choose it again and again, in spite of everything. It is never going to "end" on Neil's preferred terms. In this rare instance, fan interpretation STILL MANAGES TO ECLIPSE THE SOURCE MATERIAL---and that is because LOVE is always a more powerful story than ABUSE.

But once he was turned loose to do as he damn pleased with the material, hoo boy. You can say artistic freedom yada yada but when you carry forward a story that's more than half the work of someone else, who had a humane and uplifting message that was delivered in a funny and quirky way, and people in your fan base have literally referred to the story and its characters as lifesavers, you have a responsibility. It isn't cute or clever of you to make it into something heartbreaking, fatalistic and depressing; it's just abusive. It's a cheap power move by someone who, I propose, sees hurting people as the only way he can matter. Someone who should have gotten therapy for his own abuse long long time ago. Compare the playground bully who breaks or takes the toys of happily playing younger kids just because they can (and who's probably passing on the hot potato of their own pain and vulnerability by replicating the way they were treated).

THERE IT IS---the driving force behind every abuser's mentality.

He chose to write a story that ignored nearly everything about the original, that hurt the characters we'd come to love, that hurt his audience, and that dishonored his fellow author. It was abuse all around, and mirrors what he's said to have done to women he got leverage over one way or another.

That's true. There are actually FOUR LEVELS OF ABUSE in this instance:

1) the actual source material (Terry's book---which Neil wanted full ownership of)

2) the characters (Aziraphale and Crowley, et al---some of whom might have been self-inserts, cough Crowley, some of whom might have been stand-ins for people he hated, cough Aziraphale; regardless, he was mean to ALL OF THEM)

3) the audience (his parasocial fandom, with whom he directly interacted; he seemed oddly contemptuous toward us, in retrospect, maybe because he was jealous of our AUTHENTICITY)

4) Terry himself (the man whose legacy he so desperately wanted to co-opt; it's not a coincidence that Terry first gained traction in 1987, and that Neil first published Good Omens with him in 1990)

... Meaning, I'm pretty sure Neil Gaiman did it ON PURPOSE, knowing how much it would upset the fans.

Neil knew how badly we wanted Aziraphale and Crowley (OUR version of Aziraphale and Crowley---the specific version of them we met in Season 1) to be together. He knew we wanted to see them resolve their issues and ultimately choose to be with each other in the end.

Instead, Aziraphale and Crowley forgo that emotional journey in favor of unnecessary pain. Neither of them experience real character growth in the finale; they are shown to be the worst and unhappiest versions of themselves, without getting a real shot at redemption. They never fix their communication issues. They don't express their true, authentic feelings for one another (don't @ me with that bullshit hand kiss thing). They never manage to get on the same page emotionally---even when they both agree to commit suicide (which I'm pretty sure was not the "one thing" Aziraphale wanted).

"Why give me Crowley? Why make me complete and then take it away?"

EMOTIONAL WITHHOLDING is a common abuse tactic utilized by men like Neil. They enjoy creating ATTACHMENT in their victims and then "TAKING IT AWAY".

It's easy to see how much Neil enjoyed frustrating his fans in retrospect. He actively taunted us on social media with the catchphrase "WAIT AND SEE" and threatened to make Aziraphale and Crowley kiss---but in a way we "wouldn't like". He loved dangling the implied promise of a happy ending over our heads, which we now know he never planned to deliver on.

Neil was unkind to his audience. He was also unkind to his characters. Aziraphale and Crowley are treated as punching bags throughout the entire series---shown to be "messy" for the sake of entertainment, but not as a real obstacle for either of them to overcome. God herself says she enjoys seeing how much Aziraphale values his relationship with Crowley. And this turns out to be her justification for "taking it away". (Tell me THAT isn't some fucked up shit.) Aziraphale and Crowley experience real emotional pain as the result of her actions---and this is demonstrated by the incredible acting of Michael Sheen and David Tennant.

Neil explicitly sold this as "a love story" when he created the show. Based on the tone of the book, an eventual union between Aziraphale and Crowley would have made the most narrative sense. It would have emphasized the overarching themes of love, agency, and the futility of "choosing sides". But that would have required Neil to possess the same ethos as Terry Pratchett---meaning LOVE AND RESPECT FOR FELLOW HUMAN BEINGS.

We were never going to get a good love story out of Neil. Men like Neil get off on "PUNISHING" people for no apparent reason; he obviously did this with our beloved characters, to disastrous result. Nonetheless, we still manage to ascribe deeper meaning to Aziraphale and Crowley, thanks to the phenomenal acting team and the dedication of this fandom. Aziraphale and Crowley remain the greatest love story of all time, not because of anything Neil actually wrote, but because of everything that was projected onto them by the people who cared. We assigned their relationship a depth "Neil himself" never could have imagined---one that exemplifies our maximalist ideals of love and the decision to choose it again and again, in spite of everything. It is never going to "end" on Neil's preferred terms. In this rare instance, fan interpretation STILL MANAGES TO ECLIPSE THE SOURCE MATERIAL---and that is because LOVE is always a more powerful story than ABUSE.

Three things:

1) Check your reading comprehension. Don't @ me with things I didn't actually write.

2) Don't gatekeep which types of ABUSE to discuss. It's super shitty of you. A lot of rapists START "SMALL", you fucking idiots---usually with SUBTLE things that ESCALATE over time. (ALL abuse is worth paying attention to, even on the parasocial level.)

3) Learn to spell.

Everyone else: If you still have Neil Gaiman's books, I strongly encourage you to KEEP THEM. Reread them. Look for PATTERNS in terms of tone, character descriptions (especially for WOMEN), and overall attitude. THIS IS WHAT AN ABUSER LOOKS LIKE.

I think it's the opposite, actually.

Yes, Aziraphale is an angel, he loves, that’s what he does. But he’s not supposed to love a demon. Because of what he is, of who he is, he struggled with his feelings for Crowley for millennia. And yet, each time they met, he made the choice to speak with him, to protect him, to stay, to bond - to love.

In a universe in which angels and demons are supposed to be hereditary enemies, an angel chose a demon, over and over again (with a few notable exceptions, but we all know why - and he still loved him).

Messy? Oh, yes.

Silly? How can such a relationship, built on trust and affection, be silly?

God should NOT have approved of their relationship. Thats what made it so appealing to the viewers, right? That they weren't supposed to be together. That literally everything, from the structures surrounding them down to their literal particles as a holy and unholy being, was trying to keep the two sides apart ("angel... demon... probably explode") and that they were the only two cogs in the machine that malfunctioned and DECIDED to love each other. There wasn't some string of fate connecting them (fuck you neil gaiman). We call them ineffable husbands because their love was something hard to understand and impossible to put into words. And they were always uncertain about it, they were always scared. ESPECIALLY AZIRAPHALE! But they CHOSE this love.

It would have been so much more powerful if God had told him that She disliked his love for Crowley and Aziraphale stood his ground and said "and so what?" We could have had a scene in which they choose each other over their oppressors. Instead, God planned everything and their love, that was interesting because it was unwanted, strange, unpredictable by Heaven and Hell became the goal, the norm across universes, the prediction. Oh they were actually soulmates all along. Who find each other in every universe because a higher being wants them together.

Why?

It's not a sacrifice if you believe you have nothing left.

Heart broken. World broken. What's the point of anything.

Explain to me how in any universe that is a beautiful sacrifice, and not a horrifying, hopeless suicide.

... Meaning, I'm pretty sure Neil Gaiman did it ON PURPOSE, knowing how much it would upset the fans.

Neil knew how badly we wanted Aziraphale and Crowley (OUR version of Aziraphale and Crowley---the specific version of them we met in Season 1) to be together. He knew we wanted to see them resolve their issues and ultimately choose to be with each other in the end.

Instead, Aziraphale and Crowley forgo that emotional journey in favor of unnecessary pain. Neither of them experience real character growth in the finale; they are shown to be the worst and unhappiest versions of themselves, without getting a real shot at redemption. They never fix their communication issues. They don't express their true, authentic feelings for one another (don't @ me with that bullshit hand kiss thing). They never manage to get on the same page emotionally---even when they both agree to commit suicide (which I'm pretty sure was not the "one thing" Aziraphale wanted).

"Why give me Crowley? Why make me complete and then take it away?"

EMOTIONAL WITHHOLDING is a common abuse tactic utilized by men like Neil. They enjoy creating ATTACHMENT in their victims and then "TAKING IT AWAY".

It's easy to see how much Neil enjoyed frustrating his fans in retrospect. He actively taunted us on social media with the catchphrase "WAIT AND SEE" and threatened to make Aziraphale and Crowley kiss---but in a way we "wouldn't like". He loved dangling the implied promise of a happy ending over our heads, which we now know he never planned to deliver on.

Neil was unkind to his audience. He was also unkind to his characters. Aziraphale and Crowley are treated as punching bags throughout the entire series---shown to be "messy" for the sake of entertainment, but not as a real obstacle for either of them to overcome. God herself says she enjoys seeing how much Aziraphale values his relationship with Crowley. And this turns out to be her justification for "taking it away". (Tell me THAT isn't some fucked up shit.) Aziraphale and Crowley experience real emotional pain as the result of her actions---and this is constantly demonstrated by the incredible acting of Michael Sheen and David Tennant.

Neil explicitly sold this as "a love story" when he created the show. Based on the tone of the book, an eventual union between Aziraphale and Crowley would have made the most narrative sense. It would have emphasized the overarching themes of love, agency, and the futility of "choosing sides". But that would have required Neil to possess the same ethos as Terry Pratchett---meaning LOVE AND RESPECT FOR FELLOW HUMAN BEINGS.

We were never going to get a good love story out of Neil. Men like Neil get off on "PUNISHING" people for no apparent reason; he obviously did this with our beloved characters, to disastrous result. Nonetheless, we still manage to ascribe deeper meaning to Aziraphale and Crowley, thanks to the phenomenal acting team and the dedication of this fandom. Aziraphale and Crowley remain the greatest love story of all time, not because of anything Neil actually wrote, but because of everything that was projected onto them by the people who cared. We assigned their relationship a depth "Neil himself" never could have imagined---one that exemplifies our maximalist ideals of love and the decision to choose it again and again, in spite of everything. It is never going to "end" on Neil's preferred terms. In this rare instance, fan interpretation STILL MANAGES TO ECLIPSE THE SOURCE MATERIAL---and that is because LOVE is always a more powerful story than ABUSE.

Absolutely!

The only pushback I would give is that, while I understand and agree that the finger kiss wasn't enough, based on everything they, and we, went through to get to a point of reconciliation, I do think it COULD have been the most romantic gesture ever, in keeping with Aziraphale's Austen-influenced ideals of romance, with just a little tweak (aside from it not essentially being "goodbye forever"). Had we got to see Aziraphale head-on as he pressed his fingers to Crowley's lips, and he had mouthed "I love you" it would have been a moment of brilliance and heart-melting (again, if not paired with mutual destruction).

Yes, I do agree with you---all of those tweaks would have made the scene more emotionally explicit, which is what the story needed, and what those characters deserved.

I really don't love this trend of authors "resurrecting" themselves on social media (shoutout to Roland Barthes---"Death of the Author"). In retrospect, it's kind of creepy how Neil felt the need to insert himself into reader discussion. He could have let us have our own headcanons and admittedly unhinged blog posts (ahem). But no---he was adamant on his own authority. I almost think he was JEALOUS of the amount of depth we were able to assign to Aziraphale and Crowley. It seemed like he wanted to claim those interpretations for himself.

While I don't bear any ill will to people who liked the finale, and I'm certainly not going onto other people's posts to rain on their parade or harassing the cast and crew, I'm not sure how to exist in the GO fandom going forward.

To me, the Good Omens finale had NG's abuser mentality written all over it. Top to bottom. I see people claiming that it's so Terry Pratchett or that it's a humanist message, and I couldn't disagree more vehemently. I think the finale delivers a profoundly anti-humanist message completely at odds with Terry Pratchett's philosophy, as I understood it from his books. And it's almost painful to me that a good chunk of the fandom isn't on the same page about that.

Living well is the best way forward. I just don't quite know how that looks, for me. This was my first fandom, so first fandom heartbreak.

Living well may look like continuing to write GO fic and being a part of the fandom community, while ignoring GO3 and all/most of GO2. Many thanks to people who are tagging content about GO3 and effable husbands/Asanthony, so I can block those tags. It helps with the forgetting! But it also means my dash is now full of ghost posts.

Living well may look like using my anger productively in the real world and in support of stories not told by known abusers. Or living well could end up being both.

I cannot accept that season 1 Aziraphale would look down at Crowley, homeless and lying in a dirty sleeping bag in a garbage filled alley with literally nothing left in the world, in the deepest darkest rock bottom pit of depression and despair he’s ever been in, get told by Crowley to close the door on his way out, knowing full well he was the sole cause of Crowley’s agony, and then walk away.