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this blog is for VIRGINS ONLY. STOP having sex. START being more online and staring at a computer screen for at least 16 hours a day.

refusal to participate due to self consciousness is actually more embarrassing than participating. it took me a very long time to figure that out. abject fear of embarrassment is actually causing you to do things that are more embarrassing than what you fear. you are gonna be embarrassed anyway. let go and be free

the sandwich with no words is so uncanny. Its like its staring at me, like I was never supposed to peel back the text.

"ohhh wahhh the problem with building out america's rail network is that nobody wants to live next to train tracks-" I DO BITCH!!!!!!!! #I<3INDUSTRIALNOISES #SEXWITHATRAIN

all my haters become tomaters in my lovely summer garden

my toddler is 3 years old and wont eat anything other than fine porterhouse steaks and sweet port wine

you need to discipline your child. port is a horrible choice for the main course and wildly clashes with a rich béarnaise.

dude hes three….

And uncultured. Get a new child

online numbers can really fuck you up when it comes to your creative work because you're sharing something you worked on with all your heart but it's very important to remember there's actual people behind those numbers. even if it's 1. that's one whole actual person. that's a human being who said "haha nice". that's a connection with a REAL person with a REAL life and REAL thoughts and feelings and experiences. like. damn. that should mean something