devil may happy :)
Wouldn’t it’ve made more sense to to say devil may smile?
critique my post ever again and devil may angry

if i look back, i am lost
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@00beef-supreme00
devil may happy :)
Wouldn’t it’ve made more sense to to say devil may smile?
critique my post ever again and devil may angry

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bitches will listen to ethel cain first thing in the morning and wonder why they're unwell
The upside to the adhd forgetting that you made yourself a drink thing is thinking to yourself “man I could go for a drink right now” and looking to your right and seeing a drink has appeared there. Thank you, past me. I lost you somewhere but you have still provided.
Easily the most annoying kind of vampire in the world are the ones where you finally corner the fuckers and when you're going in with the stake they start spouting off sociology 101 bullshit to try and weasel out of it. "Oh, no ethical consumption under capitalism," "oh, the rich are the real vampires if you think about it-" yeah, yeah, you ate like fifty homeless people, asshole. Hold still
Okay but if you aren't a vegetarian your case against vampires is actually pretty weak.
I SAID HOLD STILL
$50,000 immediately dropped into my bank account wouldn't improve EVERYTHING but boy it sure would be a grand, sexy little start to a good, happy life path, don't you think
Reblog for unexpected $$$ dropping into your Bank account.
uhh did i forget how time works or was the first post in december 2018 and the second in august 2018
Reblog for time travelling $$$ dropping into your Bank account.

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"get him pregnant" well thats not my thing but to each their own
"get her pregnant" *takes up my sword and shield* i wont let you do that to her. ......................
i understand (on paper) why companies are anti-piracy but its funny when random individuals are also strongly anti-piracy. like how does it negatively affect your life if someone you know downloads a cracked torrent of sims 4. you dont work for EA. EA isnt gonna pay you for this. you lose nothing. its fine. chill out.
funny thing about anxiety is sometimes it kind of breaks your sense of danger. like i am known for repeatedly putting myself in situations that make my friends go "bro you couldve died. werent you scared?" and the answer is 👍 yjeah. i did it scared. i do everything scared. i didnt know that was the actual important kind of scary because i usually have to ignore my fears to function in society. it will happen again. watch out.
Wizards are not naturally immortal, in fact creating their own form of immortality is their graduate thesis.
“I have created a perpetual healing spell.”
“A classic. Congratulations.”
“If my soul leaves my body, this spell will keep it around and lucid enough to magic myself back together.”
“Effective. Next?”
“My spell feeds off the life force of microscopic things! When bacteria die near me, it adds to my total. Wiping down the sink with antibacterial cleaner gives me SUCH a buzz; I think I may have to dial it down a bit.”
“…I would be very curious to see your notes about this spell.”
Breaking News: Wizard Grad Student causes major religious schism by casting drain soul on microorganisms, accidentally proving Animism
“I tied my body’s physical shape to my self-image. As long as I feel young, I won’t age.”
“I see it also gave you… ah…”
“Massive dobonhonkeroos?”
“I was trying to find a more diplomatic way to bring it up.”
“An unexpected side effect, but not an unwelcome one.”
“Shall I assume it’s she/her from here on out, then?”
“Oh yes.”
“No. These are He/Him Wizard Big Naturals.”
“Ah yes of course I am familiar. Mithrandir has a set just like those.”

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Always funny to me when indie devs who already sell games for dirt cheap participate in steam sales with like 90 percent off. Like. "Yeah this game is three dollars but you can have it for one right now." Like your game costs as much as a pack of m&ms and youre selling it for the cost of a pack of m&ms in the 1950s now? Okay
And then you can’t even say shit about bc people start trying to put you in a jacket and shit. Like omg it’s so strict???
“What if poor people abuse the system?”
The system intrinsically abuses poor people.
Hope this helps.
"What if poor people abuse the system?"
Rich people abuse the system far more and out of pure greed, not necessity or desperation so idrc about that
why are scissors packaged the way they are it’s like they’re taunting us. Oh wow this is such a difficult awful packaging to get through that seems to cause physical damage to your hands as some sort of sick self defense mechanic, if only i had something to help get through it, something sharp perhaps
what sort of sick twisted game is it trying to play here
LEAVE ME ALONE
cats will be like please i need you to watch me wiggle around on this carpet please hey look look please look at me i’m wiggling

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She's being so big and brave.