ฅ⁠^⁠•⁠ﻌ⁠•⁠^⁠ฅ

whenever I tell a story I feel like Uncle Colm from Derry Girls

pulling yourself up by your strap-on or whatever they say

never ask a woman her age a man his salary your mutual how late it is in her timezone when she starts posting about that bisexual man

This is like a lazily rendered level from a ps1 game.

every hoohoohahah hahahoo

and every time we kiss I swear I could fly

when avril lavigne said And Hell Yeah Im The Mother Fucken Princess that was way real

The apple they fed to snow white wasnt poision at all it was just a red delicious

omg if i was an oracle i would be LYYYYYINGGGG

trust that garlic and i are well acquainted

work tomorrow is one of the worst things that can happen to you

Crazy thing about #healing #recovery Small Victories is when you'll have some shit going on that's like, saying this would involve admitting how you used to be doing. You know? Like hey guys good news I'm gonna change my bedsheets this year

That's the thing about Doing Really Bad you kinda keep it to yourself. And then you start doing a little better & when you try to tell people this the vibe is like "what do you mean you were living in the sewer this whole time are you good?" while you're standing there like Yeah that's not the important part never mind that. I'm literally out of the sewer