nursey you saucy bitch

I’m soooooo embarrassed. My lord told me “good night,” but I thought he was calling me a good knight, and, well, you could hear it clink against my codpiece.

having unwashed hair will have you believing shit like i can’t be saved

feminism is about blunts and weed. its about smoking marijuana, and as much of it as you can get your hands on

The sooner you start, the sooner you'll be done with it and the sooner you can stop thinking about it. Go on, up you get, it won't be as bad as you think.

You won't want to do it later either. You might as well just do it now. Even if you don't finish it all, anything you manage to get done now is something you don't have to do later (when you still won't want to do it)

a man can be your bitch wife if you’re lucky

Love when people accidentally recreate the meme like with the "fuck this post and happy birthday Sonic" one

To follow up on that rb. People who speak English as their only or first language, don’t really get how privileged that is. So many things don’t get translated into other languages. From video games to movies to books, you’re almost forced to learn English if you want to engage with that media because otherwise, it’s gonna take years for it to be available in your language, it might never even get translated, or you have to rely on fan translations and it’s that thing where if it’s only available in English, only people who speak English will know about it so you’re kinda forced. To have to talk about it in e English online. I wish we lived in a perfect world where there is no language hierarchy but that’s not the case

the water in hotel showers will do things to the texture of your hair you didn’t even know were possible

i'm so tired of social media users saying "successful people are abusing stimulants". unsuccessful people are too. #WEMATTER

tom nook is NOT a landlord!!! he is a construction worker! he SELLS you a WHOLE HOUSE! He is not CHARGING YOU however many bells a month to live there! You PURCHASE a HOME that he BUILDS FOR YOU and then you PAY HIM FOR HIS SERVICE. He charges no interest he sets no time limit it is a relationship built on trust. the only penalty you get for not paying off your home is that he won't build more home until you pay him for the first one. A guy that builds you a house wherever you want him to and then charges you for the cost of construction is not a landlord you own the fucking home

He is, however, in the mafia