don't worry about me when I say this but I think in a way being hunted for sport would be a relief. my nervous system would be like, wow. finally, a proportional reaction
$LAYYYTER

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@zilvervis
don't worry about me when I say this but I think in a way being hunted for sport would be a relief. my nervous system would be like, wow. finally, a proportional reaction

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thought of this immediately and was delighted to discover it’s the same op
I've discerned the fundamental problem of being an extrovert with introvert friends

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forget about touching grass, i need to touch THE SEA I NEED TO GO INTO THE WATER I NEED TO DIVE INTO THE SEA!!!!!!!!!!!!
hey everyone watch out for this individual. very dangerous. thank you🦌
What Have I Even Done To You Why Are You Doing This.? I Have Only Been On This Website A Day Or Two And I Am So Small I Can Barely Hurt Anyone But Any Of You Can Squish Me Very Easily.? This Isn’t Fair Or Right Please Stop
blocking.
feeling this old mitski tweet so hard lately
i will begin misusing the mature content label if i have to. this post? only for adults. because i said so.
undiagnosed autistic people will be like "I don't get upset when my routine changes though!!" and it's because they've built a set of if-then loops in their head to pick from one of 6 different strict routines and they do get incredibly upset when they're unable to keep to any of the 6 scripts. I'm john normal
This is called a fault tree. You will always know how to act if your fault tree captures all possible scenarios. In NASA Mission Control during mission critical events like landings there are huge binders with fault tree protocols, kind of like choose your own adventure books except you’re not the one making the choices, the universe is making them for you and you’re just trying to keep up.
The engineers who develop fault trees, I am told, often imagine new ways for their precious spacecraft to die (new branches on the fault trees) either while in the shower or lying awake at 3am, because human

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Do you feel bad right now? Kinda listless, like everything is being dumped on you? Eternal misery that cannot be fixed? Try eating a potato. You'll feel a lot better.
Potatoes, while obviously the single most lifegiving crop in human history, have gotten a bit of an unfair rap in the media. Be it because of carbohydrates, not enough greenery, or the fact that everyone only eats them fried to a crisp in oil and heavily salted, it seems like there is always a chance for our so-called "truth tellers" to deliver a slam to the noble spud.
Of course, improving your mood will require cooking a potato. Eating them raw does not seem to make me feel any better. And that can be difficult, if you are already feeling pretty terrible. That's why I think we should replace the police with people who hand out a baked potato. They could have like a little oven or something with them and when you want one, you get one.
Now, now, I hear a lot of you saying: oh, but then who will arrest the criminals? That's scarcity thinking. There'll be no criminals anymore. If you're feeling like you might want to rob a bank, it's possible that you just need a baked potato. With chives, little sour cream, bacon bits? Any nearby Potato Officer will provide, and then you can go right back to having a productive life, doing some kind of weird hobby instead of threatening to shoot a bunch of people unless they give you money that you would just use to buy potatoes anyway.
So I want you to think about this the next time the city police budget comes up for renewal. That could buy a lot of potatoes. Hell, it could buy some fried potatoes. Damn, that sounds pretty good right now, doesn't it? Way better than having some kind of unaccountable stealth helicopter flying down your alley because some asshole didn't get to eat dinner this evening and has committed an unspeakable crime about it.
Carnivorous plants doin this is so funny to me
They don't wanna eat their pollinators :(
i can tell when the edible starts to work when i start z-targeting shit irl
iu'm doing this shit when i run into my cat in the hallway

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shine normal like a plain rock
i have no comment this is just the funniest fucking thing i’ve seen all day