be still my lesbian ass

in the increasingly conservative-leaning global sociopolitical climate that we live in it's important to remember that "subversive" does not automatically equal "good" or even "better" lest ye become what i like to call a Temporarily Embarrassed Contrarian

dump his ass. move to a walkable city. start hormones. get into fiber crafts. dye your hair weird. grow an herb garden. foster a distrustful cat. take a welding class. invite your friends over for tea and cake. get way too into obscure media. explore a new cuisine. lie to the police. protest in the streets. life has so many possibilities don't it?

make out with a frenemy. buy noise cancelling headphones. wear office inappropriate attire. quit a toxic workplace. improve your apartment. start a dog walking sidegig. get on first name basis with your local librarians. bully politicians at town hall meetings. get an unexpected piercing. cultivate farmer's market connections. trade recipes with a gossipy old neighbor. unionize your apartment complex. move to the countryside. let a friend take you larping. keep a sword on your mantleplace

get a tattoo on your 40th birthday. be tempted to buy a loom. do a charity drag show. sue your landlord. buy a really nice kitchen appliance. volunteer at an anarchist soup kitchen. rediscover a tv show you watched when you were 8. spam your state senators. shop at asian grocery stores. do cosplay. buy trans flags in bulk and mount them along the highway. go viral for unexpected reasons. move in with your best friend. make lemoncello with leftover lemon rinds. run for school board membership. explore pegging.

update: i'm delighted to report this post has been responsible for at least one person dumping his ass

update: three four people

u used to be able to put a dvd in your computer. and then u could watch it

lots of people on here who don't understand the concept of having complex relationships with family and friends who are practically family even when you don't agree with everything they do, and i'm sorry to say, but it just indicates immaturity and that you don't understand how to navigate adulthood

PSA: tumblr user littlefuckinmonster is stealing human bones from cemeteries in Louisiana. Please don’t let them get away with this and spread the word/signal boost!

this post is officially a decade old now

For anyone who wasnt around when this happened, this was real. Littlefuckinmonster was actually stealing bones from cemeteries. She is the bone stealing witch. She was specifically stealing bones from poor people. She was arrested for it.

More Information: Tumblr’s favorite grave-robbing witch was busted with a bowl full of bones (The Daily Dot - March 31, 2016)

If you're able, I highly recommend going canoeing with your significant other before making any major commitments. You have to communicate and cooperate to go anywhere in a canoe, and telepathy is not going to get you down the river dry.

“did the journal factory burn down” is funny but doesn’t reflect my true views which are i love to follow people who overshare every moment of their day

Let’s have technical difficulties with mama

Excuse me I was doing this in the 90s

We did the parachute thing in the 70s. When Ford was president.