ello

i work at the post office beating the shit out of your fragile package

you can post on tumblr even when you're trying to take a break from social media it literally doesn't count. it's like pepsi max, or pescatarianism

the secret to organising any kind of trip with your friends is to become the benevolent dictator. do NOT wait for everyone to provide a consensus on things before you book anything. do it and then ask for feedback after. do not ask people what they would like to do just tell them what is happening and let them all nod along like the sheep they are. this is the ONLY way to coordinate a group of adults in their 20s/30s

"Just because I'm right, doesn't mean I'm being helpful" is a vastly underrated thought process that I strongly encourage others to get comfortable with

"why do you know that" i am curious about the world around me

Well I'm not too upset by this but how?

...uh huh, uh huh...

Every single Power Ranger, you say?

that comment about how you should not borrow grief from the future has saved me multiple times from spiraling into an inescapable state of anxiety. like every time i find myself thinking about how something in the future could go wrong i remember that comment and i think to myself: well i never know, it might get better. it might not even happen the way i think it will and if it does happen and it is sad and bad ill be sad about it then, when it happens. and it’s somehow soo freeing

Is ignorance truly bliss? Because a lot of dumb fucking idiots are racist and angry ALL the time.

i hate it when the ball is in my court get that shit out of here

you were born in 2006? what are you? a Honda Civic?

can i fucking help you?

i've had this queued for an entire year, the most important holiday we celebrate here in boston HAPPY GREAT MOLASSES FLOOD DAY EVERYBODY