WAIT HOLD ON I cannot fucking believe when I was like four years old my parents were cajoling me to walk with the family and trying to get me to keep up even though I kept insisting that I was "tired" until they took me to a doctor and found out my LUNGS DIDN'T WORK. how insane that we live in a world where reasonably loving parents think their FOUR YEAR OLD is trying to be LAZY. like they were mortified to be clear. adults are just so trained to ignore children's complaints as untrustworthy, kids just need discipline, they can't possibly speak for themselves. what the fuuuuck.
YOU ARE NOT IMMUNE BTW you should always be trying to take children seriously, especially very little ones but definitely all of them. the most disempowered class basically legally defined as property and most people are like "yeah that's good actually I hate when they Loiter lol they're stupid and loud and i actually think children should stop existing. restrict their personhood more actually"
I try so hard not to do this but sometimes they just lack the vocabulary or experience to get their point across. My 8 year old was complaining of stomach aches for a long time. We had doctors appointments at least once a month for the past year for tests and follow ups and such. Then he goes to the dentist. Dentists mentions his teeth are showing signs of acid reflux-related decay.
From there we were able to ask him the right questions and he’s on a diet that’s helping a lot and he’s got the right doctor referrals but it killed me to not know how to help him for so long.
Now we have a chart with descriptions on it so he can explain what he’s feeling and where.
It might not be the same type of scenario but keep in mind: you might not be asking the right questions. If they’re trying to tell you something, keep asking
this is what the other side of trying to do it right looks like btw. my post emphasizes giving a damn and listening to kids at all, and all the horror stories in the notes illustrate how lacking that was for them. but when we adults try to meet their needs as best we can, it still doesn't go perfectly. however, I think in the end this child will grow up knowing his parents tried their best and listened closely and chased answers while being sensitive to his pain. disability and health challenges exist regardless, and love alone won't solve those problems, but it will create children who become adults that can trust that the world is worth living in, that their suffering is real and deserves correcting, that they have a voice that matters. ultimately, that's what we needed and what they will need.




















