okay Jaques 😭😭 why is this so funny
it’s tragic because i didn’t include Orlando’s response, it’s even funnier. get him Orlando. you tell him.
Color Me Curious
The Bowery Presents

bliss lane

oozey mess

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Andulka
RMH
noise dept.
Mike Driver

ellievsbear
One Nice Bug Per Day

Origami Around
almost home

#extradirty

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2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year

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@wasleichtes
okay Jaques 😭😭 why is this so funny
it’s tragic because i didn’t include Orlando’s response, it’s even funnier. get him Orlando. you tell him.

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Pieter Christoffel Wonder (detail)
I see this headline:
As a former cakewrecks lover, I figured sure, I’ll bite. Let’s see this cake. Literally nothing could have prepared me for this cake.
They paid $49 for this “frog-themed” cake and honestly no amount of money in the world could be put on this masterpiece:
Keep reading
I wish I could erase this post from my memory and experience seeing this image for the first time all over again
A circulating video of sisters who bought the same clothes for their husbands 😂❤️
this gag NEVER fails to make me laugh. watching them all file in one by one and collectively laugh harder every time the next guy walks in...i could watch videos of this practical joke all day
Trans_irl
the Shame Honk
It’s a beautiful day, and you are a trans affirming goose.

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No, kids should not have unsupervised acess to the internet. Yes, I got that and it was the best thing that ever happened to me. Its a paradox.
LEIGHTON, Frederic (1830-1896)
Elijah in the Wilderness, detail 1878 Oil on canvas, 210.4 x 234.3 cm Walker Art Gallery, Liverpool, UK Ed. Orig. (Ed. Lic.: CC0 1.0)
1850s Tumblr Dashboard Simulator
👸🏻 girlbossladyjane follow
It really makes me sick to see people giving money to penny weeklies when Franklin's expedition STILL has not been found 😭 There are good men out there trapped in unimaginable temperatures and literally all that's needed is a little more funding for another rescue mission yet all you guys seem to care about are your vulgar little stories...
🧔🏻♂️ queerqueg follow
the franklin expedition is dead as hell
👸🏻 girlbossladyjane follow
Disgraceful thing to say but I'd expect nothing less from a M*lville fan
10,558 notes
👨🏻❤️💋👨🏻 hartgrindisreal
Sorry for posting so much about Tom Gradgrind/James Harthouse from Hard Times lately. It turns out that I was getting arsenic poisoning from my wallpaper? Anyway I took a seaside stroll and I'm normal now. Check your walls y'all
#whyyy did i assume they were committing unlawful actions together like where did i even get that from lol #hard times isn't even that good by dickens standards tbh
659 notes
🎨 asherbrowndurand
Just painted this
2 notes
ss-arctic-girlie-deactivated18540927
RIP Napoleon... you may have been unable to conquer Alexander's Russia but you sure as hell conquered Alexander's bed
🖼️ preraphaelitebro follow
HERITAGE POST
📝 shakespearesforehead follow
How does this have less than 100k notes you could literally not avoid this post back in the 20s lol
82,170 notes
🌄 loyalromantic follow
poets just aren't dying young in mysterious water-related incidents like they used to :/
#as useless and degenerate as i find 'the living poets' and i'm glad we're finally moving on from them #i have to agree with op in this respect
6,884 notes
🎀 thefopdiaries follow
I finally got a daguerreotype of myself ^_^ Porcelain urn for scaling
📜 bartlebi-thescrivener
i think i hauve consumption
112 notes
🐋 whaler4life
They found oil in the ground??? WTF. THIS IS LITERALLY THE WORSTTTT. FUCK MY LIFE FOR REAL THIS TIME
11 notes
🌿 naturesnaturalist follow
I swear this website has 0 reading comprehension skills. Darwin NEVER claimed we "evolved" from apes like if one of you guys actually bothered to open his new book you'll see all his arguments are backed up by evidence. He actually makes a lot of sense
#sure there's nuance like i don't fully agree with all of it #but his general theory of natural selection seems pretty sound imo
56 notes
🤵🏻♂️ byronicherotournament follow
hottest byronic hero - FINAL
Heathcliff
Mr. Rochester
🙈 butchbronte follow
Of course these are the finalists lmao this website is so predictable. Anyway vote Heathcliff if you dont i'm going to assume you're a phrenologist
📖 sapphichelenburns follow
It's not problematic to acknowledge the fact that Heathcliff was a brute like he literally killed dogs in case you forgot. Anyway #rochestersweep
🙈 butchbronte follow
I love the implication here that Rochester never did anything cruel either. He literally locked his wife in the attic and lied to Jane about it 😭 like that was a pretty significant thing that happened
📖 sapphichelenburns follow
And? God forbid women do anything
#why'd you have to pit two bad bitches against each other #anyway i'm not attracted to men but still went with rochester #bc in terms of living quarters thornfield hall > wuthering heights easily
8,027 notes
👨🏻❤️💋👨🏻 hartgrindisreal
Not the Russian tsar dying immediately after hartgrind became canon
#i know dickens hasn't technically confirmed it yet but like. SOMETHING was strongly implied ok #see: my previous post #dickensposting
522 notes
👨🏻❤️💋👨🏻 hartgrindisreal
LORD HELP ME. THE BODY LANGUAGE. THE WAY THEY'RE LOOKING AT EACH OTHER. AHHHHHH
#this installment!!! im-- #dickensposting #i can't fucking cope #dickens wants to KILL us he wants us DEAD....
2,309 notes
⭐️ newamerican
Hi guys sorry I haven't been posting lately it's been so difficult getting to California 💀 I'm finally here now though just need to find a pickaxe and soon I'll be digging! :-) wish me luck lol
#gold #gold rush #gold rush grind #california #adventure
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the angel staying over at my house asked for a nightlight in their room and i told them buddy, don't you produce your own light? what're you gonna do with more? and they said they wanted to see why people like it so much. and also that the nightlight i own is blue and they're been trying to understand color. anyways i think they've stared at it for an hour now
the angel staying over at my house said their eyes hurt from staring, so i took them to the store to get some eye drops. well midway through the medicine aisle i turned around to see them flashing in and out of colors like a combusting star, so i asked them what was up without looking directly at them. they told me that there were too many people at the store and they forgot how they looked. which. is understandable to be honest they've only been on earth for a little over 24 hours. my phone started to melt a little when i showed them pictures of themself, but my hand feels fine even though they held it while calming down. they're currently resting and i am not sure what to do with 5 empty bottles of eye drops
the angel staying over at my house has been eating my food for the past few days and i don't really know if they can taste it because the food sort of bursts into ash and fire before it reaches their mouth? but they seem to enjoy eating it or at least watching me cook. they tried to help me fry some onions earlier but the stove flame turned from blue to white and the onions started crackling instead of sizzling so they backed off. however they have the ability to chop garlic like a pro
the angel staying over at my house is taking daily walks with me around the neighborhood and i don't think they know about animals yet. we were going past someone's house and this labrador started barking at us. normal, right? but the angel staying over at my house asked me if that was music. and i had to stop and think about that one for a second. in the end i said it can be music to us, it's just that the dog doesn't know it (and may never know it, which is a real tragedy). then they asked me what's a dog
the angel staying over at my house went to the library with me and they wanted to know if humans actually dream or if that was something people made up for television. guess what the staff told us that the full name of the angel staying over at my house couldn't be printed on a library card so i just said well couldn't we have one anyways? and now we do but it's really like the first third of their name and not written correctly. oh well. i have to go help carry some huge books about neuroscience into the house
today the angel staying over at my house came up to me and started crying tears that melted through my carpet. told me they realised they wouldn't be able to use their library card after they left earth and i. i honestly forgot that was going to happen. but i told them hey dude that's just how humans feel too. can't read all the books, but the fact that you got to read some is worth bragging about, right? they could tell all of their angel friends about the cool stuff they've done. and they said that they used to think that the world was so small and that humans were being petty about missing earth but now they live here and they feel small too. and they're not sure what to tell their angel friends.
so i asked to hold their hand again. they didn't burn me this time, either. and i asked them if this moment felt small to them. they said it didn't.
anyways we made popcorn and watched it's a wonderful life. they told me that angels don't speak like that at all by the way

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have you ever considered just moving on?
hell no bitch!!!!!
Not many people talk about how deep emotional neglect hurts you.
I’m afraid to want things. I’m afraid to ask for help. I’m afraid to tell someone something if they seem in a bad mood. I can’t process when someone is nice to me. I can’t handle rejection, but my brain literally short circuits if someone gives me a compliment to the point where sometimes the rejection is better.
There are lots of overlap with emotional abuse, but emotional neglect hurts just as much. And it’s even worse that it usually goes undetected, so a lot of people can’t tell they’re being neglected until it’s too late.
JUST SAW A FED-EX DRIVER JUMP OUR OF HIS TRUCK AT A REDLIGHT AND RUN UP TO A SECOND FED-EX TRUCK (THREE CARS AHEAD) AND THE GUY LEANED OUT AND THEY JUST KISSED ON THE LIPS? HELLO?
blogging
I don't know what I thought a kiwi would sound like, but this was not it
fuck man the first maori settlers on that island had balls of steel, if i was in a new land and heard that shit in the night i would get the fuck back on my boat and go all the way back to hawaii without stopping. fuck that.
when i was a kid i used to respond to the "glass half full/half empty" question by asking how the liquid in the glass got there in the first place. nobody ever gave me a chance to explain my reasoning so i'm doing it now
if you have a glass and it has some liquid in it, up to the halfway line, whether it is empty or full depends on what happened before the question was asked. if you started with a full glass and poured half out until only half remained, the glass is half empty, because if you continued pouring it would be fully empty. however, if you started with an empty glass and poured liquid from another container into the glass up to the halfway line, the glass is half full because if you continued pouring it would be all the way full. logical, no?
i was 13 years old when somebody finally told me it was supposed to be some kind of optimism/pessimism thing. i always thought it was a riddle that nobody let me solve
Okay but that actually goes really well with the metaphor. How did you get to where you are right now? Have things gotten better or worse? Does it seem like the trend is continuing?
Nobody's really an optimist or pessimist all the time, your outlook depends on the situation and how you arrived there.

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Guys help I told my nemesis I hated them but I think they thought I meant it platonically?? They just laughed and kept fighting me on the roof top we were on, they didn't even throw out a witty one liner?? How do I get it through their thick hero skull that I hate them romantically I've tried everything from trying to blow up the moon to kidnapping the mayor but theyre so oblivious everything goes over their head! Outright saying it was my last resort and I just don't know what to do anymore
okay, skeletons have xylophones, demons have fiddles, ghosts have theremins and vampires have pipe organs. but what of the humble werewolf? what instrument does she get for her very own?
Werewolves are vocalists. What instrument could rival her beautiful howl?
They’re in a band together