Cowbell Ghoul Will Rise Again

so. i just learned that my entirely me-written resume flags as being AI-written by automated HR systems for a few writing quirks and the fact that i followed all the rules of good resume writing, which is apparently a telltale sign of AI use in this fucking hellworld. i've been desperately applying to jobs that i am massively overqualified for for months with no response, not even an interview, and now i find out that at least part of the reason is because some fucking moron decided that following the rules every career advisor has given me for a decade means i cheated and should be disqualified. the ai bubble cannot pop soon enough. what the actual fuck.

"frequent use of action-result sentences. bullet points all start with action verbs. no career gaps." girl what the fuck are you talking about. that's just resume writing advice being followed. i just did what i was told. it's a fucking resume. you're supposed to do all that stuff. what the fuck do you mean it looks ai generated and wouldn't pass basic detection systems?????????? for following the resume writing rules????????????

wishing every AI bro and ceo a very [REDACTED]

image: lazily-drawn gold star saying "I DIDNT SURVIVE IT ACTUALLY I DIED LIKE FOR REAL BUT IM BACK NOW SO ITS FINE". end ID.

Do NOT find inner peace, join my blood cult instead

“why are you like that” because im full of love and whimsy and childlike wonder